Current page: 1 (book has 3 pages in total)
Font:
100% +
Vladimir Vladimirovich Mayakovsky
MYSTERY-BUFF
A HEROIC, EPIC AND SATIRIC PICTURE OF OUR ERA
Second option
“Mystery-bouffe” is the road. Road of revolution. No one can predict with accuracy what other mountains we will have to blow up as we walk this road. Today the word “Lloyd George” pierces the ear, and tomorrow the English themselves will forget his name. Today the will of millions is striving for the commune, and in fifty years, perhaps, the air dreadnoughts of the commune will rush to attack distant planets.
Therefore, leaving the road (form), I again changed parts of the landscape (content).
In the future, everyone who plays, stages, reads, prints “Mystery-Buffe”, change the content - make its content modern, today, momentary.
VALID:
1. Seven pairs of pure: 1) Abyssinian Negus, 2) Indian Raja, 3) Turkish Pasha, 4) Russian speculator, 5) Chinese, 6) Well-fed Persian, 7) Clemenceau, 8) German, 9) Pop, 10) Australian , 11) Wife of an Australian, 12) Lloyd George, 13) American and 14) Diplomat.
2. Seven pairs of unclean ones: 1) Red Army soldier, 2) Lamplighter, 3) Driver, 4) Miner, 5) Carpenter, 6) Farmhand, 7) Servant, 8) Blacksmith 9) Baker, 10) Laundress, 11) Seamstress, 12 ) Machinist, 13) Eskimo fisherman and 14) Eskimo hunter.
3. Compromiser.
4. Intelligentsia.
5. Lady with cardboard boxes.
6. Devils: 1) Beelzebub, 2) Chief Devil, 3) The messenger, 4) The 2nd messenger, 5) The guard, 6) 20 pure ones with horns and tails.
7. Saints: 1) Methuselah, 2) Jean Jacques Rousseau, 3) Leo Tolstoy, 4) Gabriel, 5) Angel, 6) 2nd angel and 7) angels.
8. Hosts.
9. Operating Promised Land: 1) Hammer, 2) Sickle, 3) Machines, 4) Trains, 5) Cars, 6) Plane, 7) Pliers, 8) Needle, 9) Saw, 10) Bread, 11) Salt, 12) Sugar, 13) Matter, 14) Boot, 15) Board with lever.
10. Man of the future.
LOCATIONS
1. The whole universe. 2. Ark. 3. Hell. 4. Paradise. 5. Land of Wrecks. 6. Promised Land.
PROLOGUE
Unclean
After a minute
we will show you...
Mystery-buff.
I must say two words:
This
the thing is new.
To jump over your head,
I need someone to help.
Before new play
a prologue is needed.
Firstly,
Why
Is the whole theater destroyed?
Well-meaning people
This will be very infuriating.
Why do you go to performances?
In order to get pleasure -
is not it?
Is it great pleasure to watch?
if the pleasure is only on stage;
scene -
only one third.
Means,
in an interesting performance
if you build everything up,
then your pleasure will triple,
and if
the performance is uninteresting,
it's not worth watching
and one third.
For other theaters
it doesn't matter to present:
for them
scene -
keyhole.
Please sit still,
straight or oblique
and see a piece of someone else's life.
You look and see -
lounging on the sofa
Aunt Mani
yes Uncle Vanya.
And we are not interested
neither uncle nor aunt, -
You will find aunts and uncles at home.
We'll show you too real life,
but she
The theater has transformed it into an extraordinary spectacle.
The essence of the first action is this:
the ground is leaking.
Then - stomping.
Everyone is running from the revolutionary flood.
Seven pairs of unclean ones
and seven pure pairs,
that is
fourteen poor proletarians
and fourteen bourgeois bars,
and between them,
with a pair of tear-stained cheeks -
Menshevich.
The pole is overwhelmed.
The last refuge is collapsing.
And everyone starts building
not even an ark
and the ark.
In the second act
The public travels in the ark:
here you have autocracy
and a democratic republic,
and finally
overboard,
under the Menshevik howl,
the clean ones were thrown upside down.
The third act shows
that the workers
there is nothing to be afraid of,
even devils in the middle of hell.
In the fourth -
laugh harder! -
paradise appears.
In the fifth act there is devastation,
opening his immense mouth,
crushes and eats.
Even though we worked on a hungry belly,
but by us
Devastation was defeated.
In the sixth act -
commune, -
the whole hall,
sing at the top of your lungs!
Look with all your eyes!
All is ready?
And hell?
And heaven?
From behind the stage.
Ready!
Let's!
ACT ONE
At the glow of the northern lights, the globe rests with its pole on the ice of the floor. The ropes of latitudes and longitudes intersect in ladders all over the ball. Between two walruses propping up the world, an Eskimo hunter, with his finger in the ground, yells to another, stretched out in front of him by the fire.
Hunter
Hey!
Hey!
Fisherman
Loudmouth.
There is no other matter -
poke the ground with your finger.
Hunter
Fisherman
Where is the hole?
Hunter
Fisherman
What's flowing?
Hunter
Fisherman (jumping up, running up and looking under the pinching finger)
Oooh!
The work of unclean hands.
Crap!
I'll go warn the polar
circle.
Running. A German, wrung out his sleeves, rushes at him from behind the slope of the world. He looks for a button for a second and, not finding it, grabs the wool of his fur coat.
German
Ger Eskimo!
Ger Eskimo!
It's terribly rushed!
A couple of minutes...
Fisherman
German
So - today I’m sitting in my restaurant
on Friedrichstrasse.
Sun through the window
it beckons.
Day,
like a bourgeois before the revolution, it’s clear.
The audience is sitting
and quietly scheidemanit.
Having eaten the soup,
I look at the bottled Eiffels.
Think:
What kind of beef should I take?
And should I start working on the beef?
I'm watching -
and lunch stuck in my throat:
something is wrong with the Alley of Victories.
Stone Hohenzollerns,
standing between the daisies,
suddenly they flew upside down.
Hum.
I run to the roof.
Fighting around the tavern frame,
waterless surf,
no fuss at all,
ran
the neighborhoods were overwhelmed.
Berlin is a troubled sea of delirium,
invisible waves bass notes.
And for,
and above,
and under,
and before -
dreadnought houses!
And before I could spread my thoughts,
Is it from Foch, or from...
Fisherman
German
I'm all
soaked to the bone.
I'm watching -
everything is dry
but it pours, and pours, and pours.
And suddenly,
the ruins of Pompeii more pompous, painting
opened up -
with roots
Berlin was torn out
and drowned in the abyss,
at the world in a molten furnace.
I woke up on the ridge of flowing villages.
I collected all my yacht club experience, -
and so
in front of you,
dearest,
All,
what is left now of Europe.
Fisherman
B-b-a little...
German
It will calm down, of course...
a day or two.
Fisherman
Yes, speak without these European jokes!
What do you want? There's no time for you here.
German (showing horizontally)
Allow me to visit your dear
seals.
The fisherman annoyedly waves his hand at the fire, goes in the other direction - to warn the circle - and stumbles upon the wet Australians running out from behind the other slope.
Fisherman (retreating in surprise)
Weren’t there even more disgusting faces?!
Australian man with his wife. (together)
We are Australians.
Australian.
I'm Australian.
We had everything.
Something like this:
platypus, palm tree, porcupine, cactus!..
Australian (crying in a rush of feeling)
And now
we're gone
everything is lost:
and cacti,
and platypuses,
and palm trees -
everything drowned...
everything is at the bottom...
Fisherman (pointing at the reclining German)
Here, go to them.
And then they are alone.
Getting ready to go again, the Eskimo stopped, listening to two voices from both sides globe.
Cauldron, ooh!
Second
Cylinder, ooh!
First
It's getting stronger!
Stay north latitude!
Second
It's raging!
Grab the southern longitude!
An Englishman and a Frenchman are sliding off the globe along the ropes of latitude and longitude. Everyone hoists the national flag.
Englishman
The banner has been hoisted.
I am the owner full of snow.
Frenchman
Englishman (laying out some goods)
No - mine
I'm already trading.
Frenchman (starting to get angry)
No - mine
and you look for another one.
Englishman (enraged)
Ah well!
May you die!
Frenchman (enraged)
Ah well!
I'll put a bump on your nose!
Englishman (climbs with fists on the Frenchman)
England, hip-hip!
Frenchman (climbs with fists on the Englishman)
Viv la France!
Australian (rushes to separate)
Well, people!
Not the people, but pure rabble:
there are no more empires,
no imperials
and they are still punching each other in the face.
Fisherman
Eh, you
imperialists!
German
Come on, right!
Fisherman
What a crowd!
Our merchant falls directly on the head of the Eskimo, who is about to leave again.
Merchant
Honorables,
this mess!
Yes, I'm Asia?
“Destroy Asia” is a decree from the heavens.
Yes, I’ve never been Asian!
(Having calmed down a little.)
Yesterday in Tula
I sit quietly in a chair.
How the doors will burst!
Well, I think -
from Cheka!
I have, you understand,
The cheek turned pale.
But
God is most merciful in the world:
It turns out that it’s not Cheka – the wind.
It dripped a little
then it went
further more,
more - higher,
poured into the streets
the roofs blew...
All
Quiet!
Quiet!
Frenchman
Do you hear?
Do you hear the stomping?
Many approaching voices.
Flood! flood! flood! about the flood! flood!
Englishman (horrified)
Oh my God!
Misfortune - like from a drainpipe,
and then there’s this eastern question.
Ahead is the Negus, behind him is the Chinese, Persian, Turk, Raja, priest, compromiser. The procession is closed by all seven pairs of unclean ones pouring in from all sides.
Negus
At least a little blacker than snow, sir,
but nonetheless
I am an Abyssinian Negus.
My respects.
I have now left my Africa.
The Nile, the river boa constrictor, wriggled in it.
How the Nile became enraged, squeezing the kingdom into a river,
and my Africa was drowned in it.
Although there is no name,
but nonetheless…
Fisherman (annoyingly)
…but nonetheless
my respects.
We heard, we heard!
Negus
Please don't forget -
Negus is talking to you,
and the negus wants to eat.
What is this?
Must be a tasty dog?
Fisherman
Negus mistakenly tries to sit on Lloyd George, who looks like two peas in a pod.
Fisherman
Go sit down and don’t dirty anyone.
Englishman (scared)
Fisherman (addressing others)
What do you want?
Chinese
Nothing!
Nothing!
Drown my China!
Persian
Persia,
my Persia has sunk!
Rajah
Even India
Celestial India, and that!
Pasha
And only one memory remains from Turkey!
A lady breaks through from the crowd of clean ones with an endless amount of cardboard boxes.
Lady
Be careful!
Don't tear it!
The silk is thin!
(To the fisherman.)
Man,
Help me put up the cardboards.
She's so sweet!
How spicy!..
Fisherman
Idle parasite!
Frenchman
What kind of nation will you be?
Lady
My nation is the most diverse.
At first she was Russian -
Russia has become narrow to me.
These Bolsheviks are such a horror!
I am an elegant woman
with a subtle soul -
I took it and became an Estonian.
The Bolsheviks began to press on the outskirts -
I became a citizen of Ukraine.
We took Kharkov ten times -
I settled in some republic in Odessa.
Odessa was taken, Wrangel in Crimea -
I took it and obeyed him.
They drove the whites across the sea and across the field -
I'm already Turkish
I'm walking around Constantinople.
The Bolsheviks began to come closer -
and I’m already a Parisian.
I'm walking in Paris.
I've changed forty nations, I confess, I -
Now I have the Kamchatka nation.
What a lousy summer at the poles:
You can't show a single toilet!
Fisherman (shouts at clean people)
Quiet!
Quiet!
What is this hum?
Compromiser (hysterically separates from the crowd)
Listen! -
I can't!
Listen!
What is it?
There is no dry place in the world!
Listen!
Leave me alone!
Let me go home
to the office!
Listen!
I can't!
I thought there would be a flood according to Kautsky.
And the wolves are full,
and the sheep are safe.
And now -
people kill each other.
Lovely red ones!
Dear white ones!
Listen, I can't!
Frenchman
Don't rub your eyes...
don't bite your lips...
(Those approaching the fire unclean, arrogantly.)
Which nations are you?!
Unclean (together)
To chase everything around the world
Our wandering people are used to it.
We are not nations,
our work is our homeland.
Frenchman
Blacksmith (the Frenchman, patting him on his hefty belly)
The sound of the flood is probably in your ears?
Laundress (to him, mockingly and shrilly)
Would you lie down and sleep on the bed now?
I wish I could let you into the trenches and the mines!
Red Army soldier (menacingly)
I would go into the trenches -
It's wet in the trenches.
Seeing a brewing “conflict” between the pure and the unclean, a compromiser rushes to separate them.
Compromiser
Darlings! Well, don't! Don't start swearing!
Stop looking sideways at each other.
Stretch out your hands
hug each other
Gentlemen, comrades,
I have to agree.
Frenchman (viciously)
Fisherman (viciously. Both the fisherman and the Frenchman crutch the neck of the compromiser)
Oh, you compromiser!
Oh, you compromiser!
Compromiser (running away, beaten, whining)
Here you go,
again…
I'm good to him
and he…
It's always like this:
you call me to agree,
and they will hit you on both sides.
The unclean pass by, separating the disgustingly huddled crowd of the clean, and sit down by the fire. A crowd of pure ones closes in a circle behind them.
Pasha (climbs out into the middle)
Believers!
We need to discuss what happened.
Let's delve into the essence of the phenomenon.
Merchant
It's simple -
doomsday
And in my opinion - a flood.
Frenchman
And it’s not a flood at all,
otherwise
it was raining.
Rajah
Yes,
there was no rain.
Diplomat
So this idea is also wild...
Pasha
But anyway -
What happened, true believers?
Let's, true believers, look at the root.
Merchant
The people, in my opinion, have become rebellious.
German
I think it's war, I.
Intelligentsia
No,
In my opinion, the reason is different.
In my opinion, metaphysical...
Merchant (dissatisfied)
War is metaphysical!
We started with Adam!
Take turns!
Take turns!
Don't cause sodomy.
Pasha
Let's talk gradually.
Your word, student!
(Justifies himself in front of the crowd.)
And he even has foam on his lips.
Intellectual
At first
everything was simple:
day gave way to night,
but only
The dawn has become too angry!
After -
laws,
concepts,
faith,
granite heaps of capitals
and the sun itself, a motionless redhead, -
everything seemed to become a little fluid,
creeping a little,
a little liquefied.
Then how it will spill!
The streets are pouring
the melted house falls on the house.
The whole world,
melted in the blast furnaces of revolutions,
pours like a continuous waterfall.
Chinese voice
Gentlemen! Attention!
It's drizzling here!
Australian's wife
Nice drizzle!
I was as exhausted as pigs.
Persian
Maybe the end of the world is near
and we
We rally, yell and laugh.
Diplomat (presses towards the pole)
Merchant (pressing the knee of the one squeezing the hole with the patience of an Eskimo typical of this people)
Hey, you!
Off to the walruses!
The Eskimo hunter flies away, and a stream flows from the open hole into those present. The pure ones fanned out, screaming inarticulately.
A minute later everyone rushes towards the stream.
Score!
Shut up!
Clamp!
They have flown away. Only the Australian remained near the globe with his finger in the hole. In the general commotion, the priest perched himself on a couple of logs.
Brothers!
We are losing the last inch!
The last inch is flooded with water!
Who is this?
Who is this wardrobe with a beard?
This is for forty nights and forty days!
Merchant
Right!
The Lord advised him wisely.
Intelligentsia
There was a similar precedent in history -
remember the famous adventure of Noevo.
Merchant (settling in place of the priest)
Get to the point!
Merchant
Let's build a smokehouse, brothers.
Australian's wife
Right! The ark!
Intelligentsia
Here's the hunt!
We'll build a steamboat.
Rajah
Two ships!
Merchant
Right!
I will invest all the capital!
They were saved, but we are smarter than them, in no way.
General hum
Long live,
long live technology!
Merchant
Raise your hands -
who agrees.
General hum
And no hands are needed
visible behind the eyes.
Both the clean and the unclean raise their hands.
Frenchman (taking the place of the merchant, he angrily examines the blacksmith who raised his hand)
Are you going there too?
And don’t worry!
Gentlemen,
let's not take the unclean ones!
They will know how to scold us!
Do you know how to saw and plan?
Frenchman (drooping)
I changed my mind.
Let's take the unclean ones.
Merchant
We will only select non-drinkers and broad-shouldered ones.
German (stepping into the Frenchman's place)
Shhh, gentlemen,
maybe you won't have to put up with it yet
unclean.
Fortunately,
we don't know what's happening to a fifth of the world.
You're making noise and didn't even bother to find out
Are there any Americans among us?
Merchant (joyfully)
What a head!
Not a person, but a German chancellor!
Joy cuts through the cry of the Australian woman.
What is this?
An American on a motorcycle rushes straight from the hall to those watching intently.
American
(Hands out paper.)
Here
from drowned America
for two hundred billion checks.
Silent despondency. And suddenly the cry of an Australian holding water.
Australian
Why are you staring? He'll stare!
By God, I'll take it out!
Fingers are numb.
The clean ones began to fuss, rubbing against the unclean ones.
Frenchman (blacksmith)
Well, comrades,
let's build it, huh?
Kind blacksmith
What do I need,
for me at least...
(Waves his hand to the unclean.)
Let's go, comrades!
Go, go, go.
The unclean ones rise. Saws. Planers. Hammers.
Compromiser
Hurry up, comrades,
hurry up, dears!..
Get to work!
Axes and saws in your hands!
Intellectual (moves aside)
Work -
I won’t even think about it.
I'll sit here
and I'll do some sabotage.
(Yells at workers.)
Turn around quickly!
Ruby, don't miss!
A carpenter
Why are you sitting with your hands folded?
Intellectual
I am special, I am irreplaceable...
ACT TWO
Ark deck. In all directions there is a panorama of lands collapsing into waves. A ladder-mast tangled with ropes rests against the low clouds. To the side is the wheelhouse and the entrance to the hold. The clean and the unclean lined up along the nearby side.
Farmhand
Nah!
I wouldn't want to go overboard today.
Seamstress
Look there:
not a wave, but a fence!
Merchant
I shouldn't have confused this with you.
It's always like this
no point.
Sailors too!
Found a sea wolf.
Lamplighter
Look, I brought it up!
It hums and groans.
Seamstress
What a fence!
Covered with a wall!
Frenchman
Yes, sir.
Very stupid, sir!
I tell you with regret and pain, sir.
We would sit.
The earth is still standing.
No matter what it is, it is still a pole.
Farmhand
That the wolves are yours
caressing with waves.
Both Eskimos, the driver and the Australians at once.
Look,
What is this?
What about Alaska?
Negus
Well, she darted!
Like a stone with a sling.
German
Eskimo
Fisherman
No!
All
Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye!
Frenchman (burst into tears, overwhelmed by memories)
My God!..
My God!..
It happened
the whole family
let's gather at the tea table -
buns,
caviar...
Baker (measuring the tip of the nail)
Wonderful, by God!
Well, it's not a pity
not so much.
Shoemaker
I've got some vodka.
Do you have a glass?
Servant
Miner
Guys,
let's go to the hold!
Eskimo hunter
How's the walrus?
Aren't you very lean?
Servant
Nothing is fried,
nicely fried.
Clean ones. The unclean descend into the hold, singing along.
What do we have to lose? Should we be afraid of the flood?
The legs got tired - they stomped around the world!
Oh, and relaxation on ships.
Eh!
It’s not a sin to eat a walrus and sip some vodka...
Eh, no sin!
The pure ones surrounded the whimpering Frenchman.
Persian
It's a shame, really!
Stop yelling!
Merchant
We'll get by somehow
Let's crawl to Ararat.
Negus
You'll die of hunger while the mountain is still there.
American
Lots of money
and without food you can barely breathe.
I give half a million for a pound of bread
Nikolaevka
and two pounds of diamonds.
Merchant
Speculated.
I was in Cheka three times.
What the hell do I need this money for now?!
Chinese
Spit and rub.
Pasha
What diamonds!
Now, if a person has liver stones,
now and then you feel more secure -
as if the belly was full.
Australian
No grub
one trough.
Compromiser
And here Sukharevka is also closed.
Merchant (to the butt)
Nothing, humble monk,
Now there is a Smolensky market on every square.
Lady
And butter, and milk, and cream on the market, -
substitute an empty pocket instead of a lid.
Merchant
You're the one who's going to get enough without milk, you fool,
and the worker has a bonus,
the worker has a nature -
will receive
and exchange.
Lady
And I will exchange hats for eggs.
Intellectual
Exchange your last hat
and then sit
suck your paw.
Pop (listening to the noise in the hold)
Intellectual
What do they care?
They caught fish and ate them.
Let's take a net or a spear and let's catch it too.
German
Os-t-r-o-g-u?
How to handle it?
I only know how to pick at a person with a sword.
Merchant
I cast my net
I thought I’d take out a fish,
tired,
and nothing -
one grass.
Pasha (contritely)
How far have you grown:
the first guild - and eat algae.
Lloyd George (to Clemenceau)
Eureka!
Let's stop quarreling.
What kind of quarrel can there be with an Englishman?
French?
The main thing is that I have a belly, you have a belly.
Compromiser
And I have... a belly.
Clemenceau
How sad it is:
with such a wonderful gentleman -
I didn't even get into trouble with him.
Lloyd George
Now we have no time for fights:
You and I have a common enemy.
This is what I want to tell you...
He takes Clemenceau by the arm and leads him away. After whispering, they return.
Clemenceau
We are all so pure.
Should we shed sweat at work?
Let's force the unclean ones to attack us
worked.
Intellectual
I would force them!
Where should I go?
stunted!
And any of them is oblique in the shoulders.
Lloyd George
God forbid we fight!
Don't fight
and while they're devouring the menu,
while they are sitting,
drink and shout,
let's take it and give them a pig...
Clemenceau
Let's choose a king for them!
Compromiser
Why a king?
Better than a policeman.
Clemenceau
And then that the king will issue a manifesto -
All the food, they say, must be given to me.
The king eats
and we eat -
his loyal subjects.
All
Great!
Pasha
German (joyfully)
I told you -
Bismaroch's head!
Australians
Let's choose quickly!
But who?
Who?
Englishman and Frenchman
Right!
The reins are in his hands.
Merchant
What reins?
German
Well, what's their name...
the reins of power, or something...
Why are you quibbling?
There is only one meaning.
(Negusu.)
Climb up, sir!
Real, real!
Lady
Oh!
I will be a lady of the court!
Lloyd George
Hurry, hurry
write the manifesto:
by God's grace...
Pasha and the Australian
And here we are
so that they don't have time to get out.
Pasha and others are writing a manifesto. A German and a diplomat unwind a rope before exiting the hold. The unclean ones stagger out. When the latter crawled onto the deck, the diplomat and the German switch places - and the unclean ones are entangled.
German (to the shoemaker)
Hey,
You!
Take the oath!
Shoemaker (poor understanding of events)
Can I lie down instead?
Diplomat
I'll lie down for you -
You won’t get up for a hundred years!
Mister Lieutenant,
point your gun!
Frenchman
Yeah!
Sobered up!
It's easier this way.
Some are unclean (sad)
Gotcha, brothers!
like chickens in cabbage soup.
Australian
Hats off!
Who has a hat there?
Chinese and Raja (pushing the priest standing under the wheelhouse headed by the Negus)
Read it,
read, they stand there not breathing for now.
Pop (on paper)
By God's grace
We,
king of fried chickens
And Grand Duke on these same eggs,
without ripping off seven skins from anyone, -
we tear off six, the seventh is left, -
We declare to our loyal subjects:
drag everything -
fish, crackers, guinea pigs
and what other edible things can be found.
Governing Senate
won't slow down
sort through the piles of goodness,
take it away and treat us.
An improvised senate of pasha and rajah.
We obey, Your Majesty!
Pasha (disposes of)
(To the Australian.)
You - to the cabins!
(Australian.)
You are in the storerooms!
(General.)
So that the unclean does not eat anything expensive.
(To the merchant, reeling off the baker for him.)
You and him go down into the hold.
I'll go through everything with the Raja on deck.
Drag it here
and come back again.
The joyful hum of the pure.
Let's pile up a whole mountain of edibles!
Pop (rubbing my hands)
And then we will brotherly share the spoils
according to Christian custom.
Escorted by the clean, the unclean descend into the hold. A minute later they return and dump all kinds of food in front of the negus.
Merchant (joyfully)
Everything was searched
there is nothing more exactly.
What a product!
Admiration!
One word -
normalized
Well, guys, sharpen your teeth!
American
What about the unclean?
German
We need to lock them downstairs.
Well, okay,
Your Majesty, wait.
One minute!
They drive the unclean into the hold, and while they are busy with them, the negus eats everything brought. The clean ones return.
A HEROIC, EPIC AND SATIRIC PICTURE OF OUR ERA
Second option
Mystery-buff. Second option
Prologue and insert to the second version of Mystery-buff
Libretto "Mysteries-bouffe" for the program of the performance in honor of the III Congress
Comintern
"Mystery-bouffe" is the road. Road of revolution. No one can predict
exactly what other mountains we will have to blow up as we walk this road.
Today the word “Lloyd George” drills into your ear, and tomorrow they themselves will forget his name
English. Today the will of millions is rushing towards the commune, and in fifty years,
perhaps the commune's air dreadnoughts will rush to attack distant planets.
Therefore, leaving the road (shape), I again changed parts of the landscape
In the future, everyone playing, betting, reading, typing
"Mystery-bouffe", change the content - make its content modern,
today, momentary.
VALID:
1. Seven pairs of pure: 1) Negus Abyssinian, 2) Raja Indian, 3)
Turkish Pasha, 4) Russian speculator, 5) Chinese, 6) Well-fed Persian, 7)
Clemenceau, 8) German, 9) Pop, 10) Australian, 11) Australian's wife, 12)
Lloyd George, 13) American and 14) Diplomat.
2. Seven pairs of unclean ones: 1) Red Army soldier, 2) Lamplighter, 3) Driver, 4)
Miner, 5) Carpenter, 6) Peon, 7) Servant, 8) Blacksmith, 9) Baker, 10) Laundress,
11) Seamstress, 12) Machinist, 13) Eskimo fisherman and 14) Eskimo hunter.
3. Compromiser.
4. Intelligentsia.
5. Lady with cardboard boxes.
6. Devils: 1) Beelzebub, 2) Chief Devil, 3) Messenger, 4) 2nd Messenger, 5)
Guard, 6) 20 clean ones with horns and tails.
7. Saints: 1) Methuselah, 2) Jean Jacques Rousseau, 3) Leo Tolstoy, 4) Gabriel,
5) Angel, 6) 2nd angel and 7) angels.
8. Hosts.
9. Operating Promised Land: 1) Hammer, 2) Sickle, 3) Machines, 4)
Trains, 5) Cars, 6) Plane, 7) Pliers, 8) Needle, 9) Saw, 10) Bread, 11)
Salt, 12) Sugar, 13) Matter, 14) Boot, 15) Board with lever.
10. Man of the future.
LOCATIONS
1. The whole universe. 2. Ark. 3. Hell. 4. Paradise. 5. Land of Wrecks.
6. Promised Land.
PROLOGUE
Unclean
After a minute
we'll show you...
Mystery-buff.
I must say two words:
the thing is new.
To jump over your head,
I need someone to help.
Before a new play
10 a prologue is needed.
Firstly,
Is the whole theater destroyed?
Well-meaning people
This will be very infuriating.
Why do you go to performances?
In order to get pleasure -
is not it?
Is it great pleasure to watch?
20 if the pleasure is only on stage;
scene -
only one third.
in an interesting performance
if you build everything up,
then your pleasure will triple,
the performance is uninteresting,
it's not worth watching
30 and one third.
For other theaters
it doesn't matter to present:
keyhole.
Please sit still,
straight or oblique
and see a piece of someone else's life.
You look and see -
40 are hanging out on the couch
Aunt Mani
yes Uncle Vanya.
And we are not interested
neither uncle nor aunt, -
You will find aunts and uncles at home.
We will also show real life,
The theater has transformed it into an extraordinary spectacle.
The essence of the first action is this:
50 the ground is leaking.
Then - stomping.
Everyone is running from the revolutionary flood.
Seven pairs of unclean ones
and seven pure pairs,
fourteen poor proletarians
and fourteen bourgeois bars,
and between them,
with a pair of tear-stained cheeks -
60 Mensheviks.
The pole is overwhelmed.
The last refuge is collapsing.
And everyone starts building
not even an ark
and the ark.
In the second act
The public travels in the ark:
here you have autocracy
and a democratic republic,
70 and finally
under the Menshevik howl,
the clean ones were thrown upside down.
The third act shows
that the workers
there is nothing to be afraid of,
even devils in the middle of hell.
In the fourth -
laugh harder! -
80 the tabernacles of paradise are shown.
In the fifth act there is devastation,
opening his immense mouth,
crushes and eats.
Even though we worked on a hungry belly,
Devastation was defeated.
In the sixth act -
commune, -
the whole hall,
90 sing at the top of your lungs!
Look with all your eyes!
All is ready?
From behind the stage.
Ready!
ACT ONE
At the glow of the northern lights, the globe rests with its pole on the ice of the floor. By
The ropes of latitude and longitude intersect with ladders all over the ball. Between two
walruses propping up the world, an Eskimo hunter, with his finger buried in the ground, yells
to another, stretched out before him by the fire.
Loudmouth.
100 There is no other matter -
poke the ground with your finger.
Where is the hole?
What's flowing?
(jumping up, running up and looking under
pinching finger)
The work of unclean hands.
110 I'll go warn the polar
Running. A German, wrung out his sleeves, rushes at him from behind the slope of the world.
He looks for a button for a second and, not finding it, grabs the wool of his fur coat.
Ger Eskimo!
Ger Eskimo!
It's terribly rushed!
A couple of minutes...
So - today I’m sitting in my restaurant
on Friedrichstrasse.
Sun through the window
120 beckons.
like a bourgeois before the revolution, it’s clear.
The audience is sitting
and quietly scheidemanit.
Having eaten the soup,
I look at the bottled Eiffels.
What kind of beef should I take?
And should I start working on the beef?
130 I look -
and lunch stuck in my throat:
something is wrong with the Alley of Victories.
Stone Hohenzollerns,
standing between the daisies,
suddenly they flew upside down.
I run to the roof.
Fighting around the tavern frame,
waterless surf,
140 vanities not intermittently,
the neighborhoods were overwhelmed.
Berlin is a troubled sea of delirium,
invisible waves bass notes.
dreadnought houses!
150 And before I could spread my thoughts,
Is it from Foch, or from...
soaked to the bone.
everything is dry
but it pours, and pours, and pours.
the ruins of Pompeii more pompous, painting
opened up -
160 with root
Berlin was torn out
and drowned in the abyss,
at the world in a molten furnace.
I woke up on the ridge of flowing villages.
I collected all my yacht club experience, -
in front of you,
dearest,
170 what is left now of Europe.
B-b-a little...
He'll calm down, of course...
a day or two.
Yes, speak without these European jokes!
What do you want? There's no time for you here.
(showing horizontally)
Allow me to visit your dear
The fisherman annoyedly waves his hand at the fire, walks in the other direction - warn
circle - and comes across wet people running out from behind another slope
Australians.
(stepping back in surprise)
Weren’t there even more disgusting faces?!
Australian man with his wife.
We are Australians.
Australian.
I'm Australian.
180 We had everything.
platypus, palm tree, porcupine, cactus!..
Australian
(crying with a surge of feeling)
we're gone
everything is lost:
and cacti,
and platypuses,
and palm trees -
everything drowned...
190 all at the bottom...
(pointing to the reclining German)
Here, go to them.
And then they are alone.
Getting ready to go again, the Eskimo stopped, listening to two voices with
Cauldron, ooh!
Cylinder, ooh!
It's getting stronger!
Stay north latitude!
Grab the southern longitude!
Along the ropes of latitudes and longitudes the Englishman and
Frenchman. Everyone hoists the national flag.
Englishman
The banner has been hoisted.
200 I am the full owner in the snowy bosom.
No, sorry!
I installed it earlier.
This is my colony.
Englishman
(laying out some goods)
No - mine
I'm already trading.
(starting to get angry)
No - mine
and you look for another one.
Englishman
(furious)
May you die!
(furious)
210 Oh, yes!
I'll put a bump on your nose!
Englishman
(climbs the Frenchman with his fists)
England, hip-hip!
(climbs the Englishman with his fists)
Viv la France!
Australian
(rushes to separate)
Well, people!
Not the people, but pure rabble:
there are no more empires,
no imperials
and they are still punching each other in the face.
220 imperialists!
Come on, right!
What a crowd!
Directly on the head of the Eskimo who was about to go
our merchant.
Honorables,
this mess!
Yes, I'm Asia?
“Destroy Asia” is a decree from the heavens.
Yes, I’ve never been Asian!
(Having calmed down a little.)
Yesterday in Tula
I sit quietly in a chair.
230 How the doors will burst!
Well, I think -
I have, you understand,
The cheek turned pale.
God is most merciful in the world:
It turns out that it’s not Cheka - the wind.
It dripped a little
more - higher,
poured into the streets
the roofs blew...
Do you hear the stomping?
Flood! flood! flood! about the flood! flood!
Englishman
Oh my God!
250 Misfortune - like from a drainpipe,
and then there’s this eastern question.
Ahead is the Negus, behind him are the Chinese, the Persians, the Turks, the Rajas, the priests, the compromisers.
The procession is closed by all seven pairs of unclean ones pouring in from all sides.
At least a little blacker than snow, sir,
but nonetheless
I am an Abyssinian Negus.
My respects.
I have now left my Africa.
The Nile, the river boa constrictor, wriggled in it.
How the Nile became enraged, squeezing the kingdom into a river,
and my Africa was drowned in it.
260 Even though there is no estate,
but nonetheless...
(annoyed)
But nonetheless
my respects.
We heard, we heard!
Please don't forget -
Negus is talking to you,
and the negus wants to eat.
Must be a tasty dog?
270 I'll give you - doggy!
This is a walrus, not a dog.
Negus mistakenly tries to sit on what looks like two peas in a pod
Lloyd George the Walrus.
Go sit down and don’t dirty anyone.
Englishman
(scared)
I'm not the walrus
he's the walrus
and I'm not a walrus,
I'm Lloyd George.
(addressing others)
What do you want?
280 Drown my China!
my Persia has sunk!
Even India
Celestial India, and that!
And only one memory remains from Turkey!
A lady breaks through from the crowd of clean ones with an endless amount of cardboard boxes.
Be careful!
Don't tear it!
The silk is thin!
290 help me put up the cardboards.
(from the crowd of pure ones)
She's so sweet!
How spicy!..
Idle parasite!
What kind of nation will you be?
My nation is the most diverse.
At first she was Russian -
Russia has become narrow to me.
These Bolsheviks are such a horror!
I am an elegant woman
300 with a subtle soul -
I took it and became an Estonian.
The Bolsheviks began to press on the outskirts -
I became a citizen of Ukraine.
We took Kharkov ten times -
I settled in some republic in Odessa.
Odessa was taken, Wrangel in Crimea -
I took it and obeyed him.
They drove the whites across the sea and across the field -
I'm already Turkish
310 I'm walking around Constantinople.
The Bolsheviks began to come closer -
and I’m already a Parisian.
I'm walking in Paris.
I've changed forty nations, I confess, I -
Now I have the Kamchatka nation.
What a lousy summer at the poles:
You can't show a single toilet!
(shouts at the clean ones)
320 What is this hum?
Compromiser
(in hysterics he separates from the crowd)
Listen! -
I can't!
Listen!
What is it?
There is no dry place in the world!
Listen!
Leave me alone!
Let me go home
to the office!
330 Listen!
I can't!
I thought there would be a flood according to Kautsky.
And the wolves are full,
and the sheep are safe.
And now -
people kill each other.
Lovely red ones!
Dear white ones!
Listen, I can't!
340 Don't rub your eyes...
don't bite your lips...
(Those who are unclean and arrogantly approach the fire.)
Which nations are you?!
Unclean
To chase everything around the world
Our wandering people are used to it.
We are not nations,
our work is our homeland.
These are the proletarians!
Proletarians...
350 Proletarians...
(to the Frenchman, patting him on his sizable belly)
The sound of the flood is probably in your ears?
(to him, mockingly and shrilly)
Would you lie down and sleep on the bed now?
I wish I could let you into the trenches and the mines!
Red Army soldier
I would go into the trenches -
It's wet in the trenches.
Seeing the brewing “conflict” between the pure and the unclean, separate
the compromiser rushes them.
Compromiser
Darlings! Well, don't! Don't start swearing!
Stop looking sideways at each other.
Stretch out your hands
hug each other
360 Gentlemen, comrades,
I have to agree.
So that I agree?
This is too much!
(angrily. Both the fisherman and the Frenchman crutch their necks
conciliator)
Oh, you compromiser!
Oh, you compromiser!
Compromiser
(running away, beaten, whining)
I'm good to him
370 So it’s always like this:
you call me to agree,
and they will hit you on both sides.
The unclean pass by, separating the disgustingly huddled crowd of the clean, and sit down near
fire. A crowd of pure ones closes in a circle behind them.
(crawls into the middle)
Believers!
We need to discuss what happened.
Let's delve into the essence of the phenomenon.
It's simple -
doomsday
And in my opinion - a flood.
And it’s not a flood at all,
it was raining.
there was no rain.
Diplomat
So this idea is also wild...
But anyway -
What happened, true believers?
Let's, true believers, look at the root.
The people, in my opinion, have become rebellious.
I think it's war, I.
Intelligentsia
390 in my opinion, the reason is different.
In my opinion, metaphysical...
(dissatisfied)
War is metaphysical!
We started with Adam!
Take turns!
Take turns!
Don't cause sodomy.
Let's talk gradually.
Your word, student!
(Justifies himself in front of the crowd.)
400 And he even has foam on his lips.
Intellectual
everything was simple:
day gave way to night,
The dawn has become too angry!
410 granite piles of capitals
and the sun itself, a motionless redhead, -
everything seemed to become a little fluid,
creeping a little,
a little liquefied.
Then how it will spill!
The streets are pouring
the melted house falls on the house.
The whole world,
melted in the blast furnaces of revolutions,
Gentlemen! Attention!
It's drizzling here!
Australian's wife
Nice drizzle!
I was as exhausted as pigs.
Maybe the end of the world is near
We rally, yell and laugh.
Diplomat
(presses towards the pole)
Get here!
430 It won’t bury here.
(pressing the knee of the one pinching the hole with the inherent
this people with the patience of an Eskimo)
Off to the walruses!
The Eskimo hunter flies away, and a stream flows from the open hole into those present.
The pure ones fanned out, screaming inarticulately.
A minute later everyone rushes towards the stream.
Shut up!
They have flown away. Only the Australian remained near the globe with his finger in the hole. IN
In the general commotion, the priest perched himself on a couple of logs.
440 We are losing the last inch!
Who is this wardrobe with a beard?
This is for forty nights and forty days!
Right!
The Lord advised him wisely.
Intelligentsia
There was a similar precedent in history -
remember the famous adventure of Noevo.
(putting himself in place of the priest)
Nonsense -
450 and history, and precedent, and more...
Get to the point!
Let's build a smokehouse, brothers.
Australian's wife
Right! The ark!
Intelligentsia
Here's the hunt!
We'll build a steamboat.
Two ships!
Right!
I will invest all the capital!
They were saved, but we are smarter than them, in no way.
General hum
460 Long live
long live technology!
Raise your hands -
General hum
And no hands are needed
visible behind the eyes.
Both the clean and the unclean raise their hands.
(taking the place of the merchant, he examines the blacksmith with anger,
raised his hand)
Are you going there too?
And don’t worry!
let's not take the unclean ones!
Do you know how to saw and plan?
(dropping)
I changed my mind.
Let's take the unclean ones.
We will only select non-drinkers and broad-shouldered ones.
(climbing into the Frenchman's place)
Shhh, gentlemen,
maybe you won't have to put up with it yet
unclean.
Fortunately,
we don't know what's happening to a fifth of the world.
You're making noise and didn't even bother to find out
480 Are there any Americans among us?
(joyfully)
What a head!
Not a person, but a German chancellor!
Joy cuts through the cry of the Australian woman.
An American on a motorcycle rushes straight from the hall to those watching intently.
American
Dear sirs,
where is the ark being built here?
(Hands out the paper.)
from drowned America
for two hundred billion checks.
Silent despondency. And suddenly the cry of an Australian holding water.
Australian
Why are you staring? He'll stare!
490 By God, I’ll take it out!
Fingers are numb.
The clean ones began to fuss, rubbing against the unclean ones.
(to the blacksmith)
Well, comrades,
let's build it, huh?
Kind blacksmith
What do I need,
for me at least...
(Waves his hand to the unclean.)
Let's go, comrades!
Go, go, go.
The unclean ones rise. Saws. Planers. Hammers.
Compromiser
Hurry up, comrades,
hurry up, dears!..
500 For work!
Axes and saws in your hands!
Intellectual
(steps aside)
Work -
I won’t even think about it.
I'll sit here
and I'll do some sabotage.
(Shouts at the workers.)
Turn around quickly!
Ruby, don't miss!
Why are you sitting with your hands folded?
Intellectual
I'm special, I'm irreplaceable...
ACT TWO
Ark deck. In all directions there is a panorama of lands collapsing into waves. IN
low clouds rest against a ladder-mast tangled with ropes. Wheelhouse to the side
and the entrance to the hold. The clean and the unclean lined up along the nearby side.
I wouldn't want to go overboard today.
Look there:
not a wave, but a fence!
I shouldn't have confused this with you.
It's always like this
no point.
Sailors too!
Found a sea wolf.
Lamplighter
Look, I brought it up!
520 It hums and groans.
What a fence!
Covered with a wall!
Very stupid, sir!
I tell you with regret and pain, sir.
We would sit.
The earth is still standing.
No matter what it is, it is still a pole.
That the wolves are yours
530 waves caress.
Both Eskimos, the driver and the Australians at once.
What about Alaska?
Well, she darted!
Like a stone with a sling.
Whoa!
Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye!
(burst into tears, overwhelmed by memories)
540 My God!..
My God!..
the whole family
let's gather at the tea table -
Baker.
(measuring the tip of the nail)
Wonderful, by God!
Well, it's not a pity
not so much.
Shoemaker
550 I saved some vodka.
Do you have a glass?
There will be.
let's go to the hold!
Eskimo hunter
How's the walrus?
Aren't you very lean?
Nothing is fried,
nicely fried.
Clean ones. The unclean descend into the hold, singing along.
What do we have to lose? Should we be afraid of the flood?
560 The legs got tired - they stomped around the world!
Oh, and relaxation on ships.
It’s not a sin to eat a walrus and sip some vodka...
Eh, no sin!
The pure ones surrounded the whimpering Frenchman.
It's a shame, really!
Stop yelling!
We'll get by somehow
Let's crawl to Ararat.
You'll die of hunger while the mountain is still there.
American
570 Lots of money
and without food you can barely breathe.
I give half a million for a pound of bread
Nikolaevka
and two pounds of diamonds.
Speculated.
I was in Cheka three times.
What the hell do I need this money for now?!
Spit and rub.
What diamonds!
580 Now, if a person has liver stones,
now and then you feel more secure -
as if the belly was full.
Australian
No grub
one trough.
Compromiser
And here Sukharevka is also closed.
Nothing, humble monk,
Now there is a Smolensky market on every square.
And butter, and milk, and cream on the market, -
substitute an empty pocket instead of a lid.
590 You’re the one who’s going to get enough without milk, you fool,
and the worker has a bonus,
the worker has a nature -
and exchange.
And I will exchange hats for eggs.
Intellectual
Exchange your last hat
and then sit
suck your paw.
(listening to the noise in the hold)
Look, they're laughing!
Intellectual
600 What to them!
They caught fish and ate them.
Let's take a net or a spear and let's catch it too.
Os-t-r-o-g-u?
How to handle it?
I only know how to pick at a person with a sword.
I cast my net
I thought I’d take out a fish,
and nothing -
610 one grass.
(confused)
How far have you grown:
the first guild - and eat algae.
Lloyd George
(to Clemenceau)
Let's stop quarreling.
What kind of quarrel can there be with an Englishman?
French?
The main thing is that I have a belly, you have a belly.
Compromiser
And I have... a belly.
Clemenceau
How sad it is:
with such a wonderful gentleman -
I didn't even get into trouble with him.
Lloyd George
Now we have no time for fights:
You and I have a common enemy.
This is what I want to tell you...
He takes Clemenceau by the arm and leads him away. After whispering, they return.
Clemenceau
We are all so pure.
Should we shed sweat at work?
Let's force the unclean ones to attack us
worked.
Intellectual
I would force them!
Where should I go?
And any of them is oblique in the shoulders.
Lloyd George
God forbid we fight!
Don't fight
and while they're devouring the menu,
while they are sitting,
drink and shout,
Let's take it and give them a pig...
Clemenceau
Let's choose a king for them!
Compromiser
Why a king?
640 Better than a policeman.
Clemenceau
And then that the king will issue a manifesto -
All the food, they say, must be given to me.
The king eats
and we eat -
his loyal subjects.
(joyfully)
I told you -
Bismaroch's head!
Australians
650 Choose quickly!
Englishman and Frenchman
Right!
The reins are in his hands.
What reins?
Well, what's their name...
the reins of power, or something...
Why are you quibbling?
660 There is only one meaning.
Climb up, sir!
Tell -
this will be a real king
or just pretend?
Real, real!
I will be a lady of the court!
Lloyd George
Hurry, hurry
670 write the manifesto:
by God's grace...
Pasha and the Australian
And here we are
so that they don't have time to get out.
Pasha and others are writing a manifesto. A German with a diplomat unwinds in front of
the exit from the hold is a rope. The unclean ones stagger out. When is the last
crawled onto the deck, the diplomat and the German changed places - and the unclean ones were entangled.
(to the shoemaker)
Take the oath!
Shoemaker
(poor understanding of events)
Can I lie down instead?
Diplomat
I'll lie down for you -
You won’t get up for a hundred years!
680 Mister Lieutenant,
point your gun!
Sobered up!
It's easier this way.
Some are unclean
(sad)
Gotcha, brothers!
like chickens in cabbage soup.
Australian
Hats off!
Who has a hat there?
Chinese and Raja
(they push the priest standing under the wheelhouse headed by the negus)
Read it,
690 read, they stand not breathing for now.
(on paper)
By God's grace
king of fried chickens
and the Grand Duke on the same eggs,
without ripping off seven skins from anyone, -
we tear off six, the seventh is left, -
We declare to our loyal subjects:
drag everything -
fish, crackers, guinea pigs
700 and what else you can find edible.
Governing Senate
won't slow down
sort through the piles of goodness,
take it away and treat us.
An improvised senate of pasha and rajah.
We obey, Your Majesty!
(disposes)
(To the Australian.)
You - to the cabins!
(To the Australian.)
You are in the storerooms!
So that the unclean does not eat anything expensive.
(To the merchant, unwinding the baker for him.)
You and him go down into the hold.
710 I will look over everything with the Raja on deck.
Drag it here
and come back again.
The joyful hum of the pure.
Let's pile up a whole mountain of edibles!
(rubbing hands)
And then we will brotherly share the spoils
according to Christian custom.
Escorted by the clean, the unclean descend into the hold. After a minute
they return and dump all kinds of food in front of the negus.
(joyfully)
Everything was searched
there is nothing more exactly.
What a product!
Admiration!
720 One word -
normalized
Well, guys, sharpen your teeth!
American
What about the unclean?
We need to lock them downstairs.
Your Majesty, wait.
One minute!
They drive the unclean into the hold, and while they are busy with them, the negus eats everything
brought. The clean ones return.
Clemenceau
Are you coming, Lloyd George?
Lloyd George
(goad each other)
730 Hurry, hurry,
time for food!
They climb up to the negus. There is an empty dish in front of the negus. In one menacing voice.
What's here?!
Was Mamaev's army playing?
(in a frenzy)
Alone, after all,
and to eat so much!
I would have taken it and smacked it in the well-fed face.
I am God's anointed.
740 Anointed One,
anointed one!
I wish I could lie down like us...
Diplomat
On empty stomach...
This was not the day I was thinking about.
The morning is wiser than the evening.
Laying down. Night. The moon passes quickly across the sky. The moon is bowing.
Dawn. The figure of a diplomat rises in the blue morning. On the other side
The German rises.
Diplomat
Are you sleeping now?
The German shakes his head negatively.
Diplomat
750 Did you wake up in this clearing?
You'll fall asleep here!
There's such a conversation in my stomach.
Well, talk, talk some more!
Compromiser
I keep dreaming about cutlets.
What else could you have dreamed about?
Damn you! It's so shiny.
Australian
Intellectual
No spiritual requests!
I've eaten too much and I'm glad.
(after a short pause)
760 Gentlemen,
you know what?..
I feel like I'm already a democrat.
Here's the news!
I have always loved people without memory.
And who suggested that His Majesty follow at his feet?
Diplomat
Throw your poison arrows!
Autocracy as a form of government is undoubtedly
outdated.
It becomes obsolete if no dewdrops get into your mouth.
Seriously! Seriously!
770 A coup is brewing.
Enough strife
Let's put an end to the fighting!
Compromiser
Hurray for the Constituent Assembly!
(The hatch falls off.)
Hooray! Hurray!
(Each other.)
Play up!
The awakened unclean ones climb out of the hatch.
Shoemaker
What is this? Did you get too drunk?
780 Citizens, please come to the rally!
(To the baker.)
Citizen, are you for a republic?
Unclean
Republic?
Which one?
Now the intelligentsia will explain.
(To the intellectual.)
Hey, you intelligentsia!
The "intelligentsia" and the Frenchman are getting into the wheelhouse.
I declare the meeting open.
(To the intellectual.)
Your word!
Intellectual
790 Citizens!
This queen has an impossible mouth!
Right!
That's right, citizen speaker!
Intellectual
The damned one will devour everything as it is!
Right!
Intellectual
will never crawl to Ararat.
Right!
Right!
Intellectual
800 Enough!
Break the rusty chains!
General hum
Down with autocracy!
Compromiser
Who are you raising your hand to?
You will have to live on bunks all your life in hard labor.
Power from God.
Don't touch it
810 gentlemen.
Agree to a constitutional monarchy,
on Grand Duke Nicholas
on Mikhail.
Unclean and pure
Agree
for everything to be devoured by him?
I agree with you!
We will agree with you!
Compromiser
(bloated, crying)
How they started to warm up!
820 How they began to cover!
It's easier to die
than to reconcile them.
Drank some blood
spoiled the people...
Alon Zanfan into the water!
With their joint efforts they rock the negus and throw him overboard. Then they take the clean ones
under the hands of the unclean and disperse, whispering.
Diplomat
(to the miner)
Comrades,
you won't even believe it
I'm so incredibly happy:
830 now there are no longer these age-old barriers.
(to the blacksmith)
Congratulations!
Centuries-old foundations have collapsed.
(vague)
The rest will work out
the rest is empty!
Now we are for you, you are for us.
(pleased)
So-so! Lead by the nose.
Was I ardent towards the negus?
840 I breathe the Founder!
For the Provisional Government -
anything!
I’ll be pregnant for at least two years!
Now I’ll put on red bows, -
we need to start a revolutionary fashion.
I'll be back in a minute
to my beloved people.
(Runs to the cardboard boxes.)
Clemenceau
(on the wheelhouse)
Well, citizens, that's enough.
We walked around to our heart's content.
850 Let's organize democratic power.
Citizens,
so that all this happens soon and quickly,
Here we are - God rest the soul of the Negus! - We
here are thirteen
we will be ministers and assistant ministers,
and you are citizens of a democratic republic, -
you will catch walruses, sew boots, bake
No objections?
Are the arguments accepted?
860 It would be close to the water.
Long live, long live democratic
republic!
And now I
(unclean)
I suggest you work.
And you - for the feathers.
Work,
bring it here
and we will divide it equally, -
the last shirt will be torn in half.
The clean ones set up a table, sit down with papers, and when the unclean ones
They bring food, put it in the inbox and, when they leave, eat it with appetite.
The baker, who came for the second time, tries to look under the papers.
Lloyd George
Why are you staring?
870 Get away from the papers!
This, brother, is not a matter of your mind.
Clemenceau
You are in government
you don't understand anything at all.
Every plate that comes in
and every outgoing
must be renumbered.
While you are putting the number,
lest our brother, the unclean one, die.
Baker
Let's share what we promised.
(indignantly)
880 Brothers!
It's too early to think about food for us.
(moving away from the table)
Look at the shark -
they caught a shark there, -
does not lay eggs
Doesn't it give milk?
Hey Raja, are you Pasha?
Remember the Turkish proverb:
"Pasha, don't be naughty!"
(returning with other unclean ones)
890 No matter how much you milk the sharks,
not be from shark milk.
Shoemaker
(to the writer)
Time to have lunch. Finish it quickly!
American
Note,
how beautiful it is:
waves and seagull.
Let's talk better about cabbage soup and tea.
We have no time for seagulls!
Clemenceau
900 Look, look!
Red Army soldier
Fuck the whale!
You yourself are a whale!
In chorus, overturning the table.
Don't give us any paperwork here!
Empty plates crash onto the deck.
Seamstress and laundress
(sad)
The ministerial council lapped everything up.
(jumping onto an overturned table)
Comrades!
It's a knife in the back!
910 Comrades!
What is this!
Previously, they ate with one mouth, but now they devour with a mouthful.
Republic
turned out to be
the same king
Yes, only the hundredth.
(picking teeth)
Why are you boiling?
We promised and we divide equally:
one - a bagel,
920 For another - a donut hole.
This is a democratic republic.
Somebody needs some seeds - not everyone
Unclean
We will show you the class struggle!
Compromiser
and again the blood is destroyed,
and again confusion and noise.
Enough!
Enough!
930 Don't shed blood!
Listen, I can't!
This is all good:
and commune
And so on.
But for this to happen, centuries must pass.
Comrade workers!
Agree with the pure ones,
listen to the old one
an experienced Menshevik!
Lloyd George
940 Agree?
Yes, I will lose my capital.
We will agree with you!
Red Army soldier
I agree with you!
Compromiser
What a situation!
Two-way taxation again!
The unclean attack the clean.
Stop, citizens! Our policy...
Unclean
Set fire on four sides!
Let's show them what politics is like!
950 Well, hold on, damned one,
you will remember October 25th!
They arm themselves with weapons folded clean during lunch. They are driven to the stern.
The heels of the clean ones being thrown off flash. Only a merchant, stealing half of it on the move
a walrus huddled in a coal bin; in another an intellectual and a lady were huddled.
The compromiser grabbed the farmhand's hand; Trying to pull it back, he sobs.
Look, damned one,
I'm drooling!
The revolution is not for you, monsieur, cadet.
The Compromiser bites into his hand.
Look, you wicked one!
Get him down guys
into the hatch hole!
Chimney sweep
I wouldn't choke there,
corruption is fragile -
960 is straight lady.
Why mumble!
Will come back
we will be crucified on the cross.
Let's pamper -
give Mount Ararat.
Unclean
Right!
Right!
Either we - or them!
Make way for terror!
970 Comrades!
Throw away the clique with your boots.
Hey people, why aren't you rejoicing?
Baker
Have you thought about bread?
And what to sow the grain with?
Lamplighter
Rejoice! When instead of arable land there are abysses.
And there is nothing to fish with, the nets are torn.
980 How will you get through this abyss?
If only it were dry all around.
The ark is cracking.
There is no compass.
Don't stop halfway.
Eaten in the drowned,
you can't take it back.
Now there is only one thing left to argue about,
so that the power does not dry up until the place of Araratov.
990 Let the storms beat us,
let the heat fry
let hunger -
let's look into his eyes,
We'll just eat sea foam.
But we are the masters here!
Let's eat today
and tomorrow - the lid!
There are two crackers on the entire ark.
1000 Comrades!
Do not give crackers without cards.
A lady and an intellectual emerge from a coal bin.
Intellectual
Do you hear -
"Give some crackers."
And here there is hunger, cold and all sorts of passions.
Let's go to the service of the Soviet government.
Unclean
People from the other world?
Intellectual
No way.
1010 We are our own,
we are non-partisan,
we are from the coal bin.
We are for the power of the councils.
I hate the bourgeoisie!
Fraudsters!
I kept waiting to see if the bourgeoisie would fall soon.
Allow me,
I'll be with you too
work
1020 on a typewriter,
at least with just one finger.
Intellectual
And take me.
It's bad without a specialist.
Without specialist
nowhere to go.
One way -
We won't drown
don't croak.
1030 Sit down, comrade.
(To the intellectual.)
March down!
Manage the stoker.
Without food is like a car without firewood.
Even I pass - I’m so healthy.
Red Army soldier
It turns out that it’s not enough to get clean ones.
Need bread.
We need to get water.
Unclean
What to do?
What should I do?
1040 God cannot let us die.
Let's fold our hands and wait.
Muscle after muscle weakens from hunger.
(listening)
Can you hear the music?
The Antichrist gave us a speech
about Ararat and paradise.
(Jumps up in fear, finger overboard.)
walks through the waves,
1050 plays his own dice?
Chimney sweep
Come on!
The sea is g_o_lo.
And who should appear?
Shoemaker
This is hunger
He's coming to break his fast with us.
Well, go!
There are no people here who would fall.
1060 Comrades, the enemy is on board!
Everyone on deck!
he goes to board himself.
They run in, staggering, armed with anything. It's dawn. Pause.
Well, go!
Let us again look at the barren bosom of waters.
So you pray for shade in the ovens of the desert,
1070 dying w -
you see that the desert is freezing.
(gets terribly excited, adjusts his glasses,
peers. Kuznets)
in the West -
won't you notice the dots?
What to watch?
It’s like putting it on your tail or pounding it in a mortar
(runs away, fumbles, climbs onto the yard with a pipe - and through
Ararat! Ararat! Ararat!
From all over.
Oh, how glad I am!
1080 Oh, how glad I am!
They snatch the driver's pipe. Huddled together.
appears
to the right of...
It rose.
Straightened up.
1090 That is, how is it going?
Ararat is a mountain and cannot be walked.
Rub your eyes.
Some kind of person.
Yes, man.
Old man with a staff.
Young without a staff
1100 Ek, walks on water that is dry.
Bells, ring!
Cue the ringing!
walked, cutting through the waters of Gennesaret.
God has apples
oranges,
springs can fall seven times a day,
1110 and the Almighty only turned his back to us,
now he is caught in a trap by Christ.
Don't need it!
We won't let the rogue in!
Hungry mouths are not for prayers.
Don `t move!
Otherwise your hand will rise.
The most ordinary person enters the frozen deck.
1120 I'm not from the class,
not from the nation
not from the tribe.
I saw the thirtieth
fortieth century.
I'm from the future tense
just a man.
Came to hype
I am the soul of the forge,
for I know
1130 how difficult it is to try to live.
Listen!
nagornaya
sermon!
Are you waiting for Ararat?
There are no Araratov.
Dreamed about it in a dream.
1140 the mountain does not go to Mohammed,
then to hell with her!
I’m not yelling at you about the paradise of Christ,
where fasting people lick tea without sugar.
I'm talking about real ones
screaming in the heavens of earth.
Judge for yourself: is Christ’s heaven,
Is it a hungry sky for the evangelists?
My paradise - its halls are filled with furniture,
electrical services the peace is fashionable.
1150 There sweet labor does not calluse your hands,
work blooms like a rose in the palm of your hand.
There the sun plays such tricks
that every step in the color world drowns.
Here the gardener's experience pores for centuries -
glass flooring, manure mound,
on dill roots
Pineapples grew six times a year b.
We'll all go!
Because what do we have to lose!
But will they let our sinful army in?
My paradise for everyone
except the poor in spirit,
from great fasts swollen like the moon.
It's easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle,
than to me
such an elephant.
who quietly stabbed the knife
1170 and went away from the enemy's body with a song!
Go, unforgiving!
You are the first to enter
to my kingdom
not heavenly.
Go everyone
who is not a pack mule.
who is unbearable and cramped,
my kingdom
earthly - not heavenly.
Doesn't this one laugh at the beggars?
What pages are you teasing?
The road is long.
We need to get through the clouds.
We will defeat each cloud one by one!
1190 What if hell rises behind hell?
Let's go there too.
Let's not move backwards.
Lead us!
Waiting for someone else to tell you.
here,
1200 at hand.
Where are your hands?
What are you doing with it?
Folded crosses of useless hands!
You are huddling with beggars.
And you are rich.
Look -
what wealth is around!
How dare the wind play with the ark?
Down with nature's impudent yoke!
1210 You will live in warmth,
causing a wave of electricity to move.
you will find yourself sunk,
not scary either -
cleaner than meadows
sea bottom.
Our daily bread
grows on it -
1220 hard coal.
Let the wind howl in floods,
The sides of the ark-vessels are cracking.
Right and left -
The floor is yours.
Disappears. There is admiring bewilderment on deck.
Shoemaker
1230 I think he is in me.
In my opinion, he managed to get into me too.
Who is this deranged spirit?
no name?
without a middle name?
Why him?
What prophecies did you cast?
1240 There is a deadly bath all around the flood.
The promised one will be found!
So, there is still heaven.
So, it’s not stupid to climb to happiness.
To get to this point earlier,
raise your hammers
axes up!
Straighten the ranks!
Don't bend the lines!
1250 The Ark is cracking.
Salvation is in discipline.
(hand on the yards)
The gaping mouth is ominous.
There is only one road -
through the clouds!
They rush to the mast. In chorus.
Through the sky - forward!
A battle song unfolds on the yards.
Hey, to the yards!
On the yards, hey!
Ahead, Commissars of the Seas!
1260 Forward, commissioners of the seas!
Shoemaker
There, all the winners can rest after the battle.
Even if your feet are tired, let’s kick them into the sky!
Let's shoot bloody ones into the sky!
The firmament is wide open
heaven beyond the fence!
Along the sun ladders,
down the rainbow stairs!
Along the solar gangway
1270 rainbow swings!
Enough prophets!
We are all Nazarenes!
Slide onto the masts
grab the yards!
To the masts!
To the masts!
When the last unclean one disappears, a lady and
intellectual. The Menshevik stands for a moment, thinking.
Compromiser
1280 To the commune?
Hunting to go so far!
Looks around. The ark is cracking.
Forward, comrades!
It's better to move forward than to die...
The Menshevik disappears, and finally the merchant crawls out of the coal bin,
grinning.
You have to be an ass!
Good for four hundred million
Even if it's scrapped.
and speculative!..
1290 What is this?
It breaks.
Save yourself!
We're going down!
Comrades!
Comrades!
Wait one minute!
Comrades!
1300 I’m dying here!..
Compromiser
and you will get the concession...
ACT THREE
Hell. Scene with a huge door. On the door: “Do not enter without a report.” On the sides
guard devils. Two messenger features echo throughout the entire theater. Quiet
singing on stage outside the door.
We are devils, we are devils, we are devils, we are devils!
We turn sinners on a spit.
1st messenger
Yes, brother, damn it,
lousy life!
2nd messenger
Yes, I have suffered through grief in recent months.
One word -
1310 The priests were dispersed, the bagmen in the robe.
Now we have a food crisis.
Our brother, the original devil, is not visible at all.
How did these same gentlemen get there:
Then give it to me!
Give it to me!
The worst of all is this Abyssinian negus.
The muzzle is black.
Swine's appetite.
Oh woe, oh woe, oh woe, oh woe,
1320 without food we will all die here soon!
It used to be that the devil had a watermelon on his cheek.
Yes, it is true.
And how the priests were driven away, not a single supplier!
Issues are small!
The ration is bad!
If only the devils were properly
otherwise disgusting -
1330 They will wait,
We will have a revolution too.
The call again.
We run as fast as we can.
They jump over the entire stage.
The guards question the messengers and, having made a short report,
doors open.
Lloyd George
Oh, you devils!
Oh, you damn children!
Why don't sinners fall into the net?
(waves at the messengers)
Well, that's why I worked for you,
to eat rations in the next world!
messengers
(dissatisfied)
1340 They would take a fork,
they would catch it themselves.
Clemenceau
Give up these habits.
We are white bone devils.
Sparing no sweat,
black devil on white should work.
2nd messenger
They established their own order.
Class antagonism has gone to hell.
Oh, are you talking?
1350 How ardent!
Yes, I'll stab you with a knife!
Yes, I'll hit you with a fork!
Devil the master of ceremonies
His Majesty Beelzebub
wishes to speak with the loyal subject of hell.
Don't wiggle your butt!
Beelzebub
Damn my loyal subjects!
You won't sit around hungry anymore.
1360 Joyful clique!
Tail up!
The great one ends
the post ends.
There are fifteen sinners, no less.
(crosses himself)
God bless!
This dry singing ends.
The people are very serious
albeit a messless one.
Oh, and I'll get drunk!
1370 The devil will be sick of it!
Lloyd George
I'll sharpen the horns!
They will know how to overthrow me!
Beelzebub
(to the messengers)
to the guard post!
On the binoculars,
look better
so that not one of them leaves alive!
you'll get it in the neck.
The devils, armed with binoculars, run into the hall, listening.
The door swings open.
1380 Just let them get caught!
I'll show them!
I'll raise my tail!
Horns down!
It's downright creepy!
I'll deal with them!
I wouldn't wish it on my enemy.
I love juicy sinner stew.
I simply eat them.
No pieces.
Do you hear? -
Knock-Knock.
Knock-Knock.
Listens. The rumble of the unclean, spreading the threshold of hell, can be heard.
The old man is ours
will be extremely happy.
Shut up, damn it! It’s impossible without a rumble!
warn Beelzebub's headquarters.
The first one runs. Beelzebub appears above the middle tier. Palm
to the forehead. The devils rise up.
Beelzebub
(convinced, he yells)
1400 Devils!
Drag the cauldron!
Yes, more firewood -
Hide behind the clouds, tough battalion!
So that none of them gets out of the way!
The devils are hiding. From below comes: “To the masts, to the masts! For the yards, for the yards!”
A crowd of unclean people rushes in, and immediately devils with pitchforks come out
at the ready.
Oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh!
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
(pointing to the extreme seamstress, laughing)
Old friends!
1410 How do you like it?
We dealt with the hornless ones.
And the horned ones will be dealt with.
The hubbub began to get boring. The unclean ones tsked.
The confused devils fell silent.
Unclean
(hesitantly)
(to purgatory)
Comrades!
Do not stop!
Straight there.
Beelzebub
1420 Devils forward!
Don't let me into purgatory!
Listen,
what kind of style is this?
Give it up!
Beelzebub
(offended)
That is, how to quit?
Still an old devil
at the very grey.
1430 By God, we found something to frighten!
At the factory
iron smelting
haven't been, huh?
Beelzebub
I was not at your smelter.
Otherwise I would fade
fur.
You live here
1440 is smooth and hard.
Beelzebub
Good smooth
good hard!
Enough talking! Welcome to the fires!
Baker
I found something to scare!
Funny, by God!
you would also get paid for the firewood.
1450 Colic from frost,
temperature is healthy.
Bliss!
Go naked.
Beelzebub
Enough jokes!
Tremble for souls!
We'll suffocate you all with sulfur right now!
(angry)
They brag too!
What do you have? -
1460 Smells slightly of sulfur.
Here they let in asphyxiating gas -
the whole steppe turns gray from the greatcoats,
the division falls to the ground at once.
Beelzebub
Be afraid, I tell you, of red-hot braziers!
You will be on pitchforks,
the hour is uneven.
(losing his temper)
Why are you boasting about some kind of pitchfork!
Your stupid hell is like honey to us.
1470 in attack
three quarters will break out
in one breath with machine-gun fire.
The devils hung their ears.
Beelzebub
(trying to maintain discipline)
What are you worth?
They opened their mouths!
Maybe he's lying about all this.
Sit here
caves cavernite -
1480 Listen,
I'll tell you...
About our earthly horror.
What is your Beelzebub!
Walking with a fork in the middle of hell.
I'll call you to the ground for a minute.
Do you, devils, know what a blockade is?
Should we be afraid of some pitchforks!
The workers are treated to English tanks.
1490 The ring crushed squadrons and armies
capital of the workers' Republic.
At least you don’t have righteous people or children.
Your hand probably doesn’t rise to torment?
And we have those too!
No, devils,
you're better here.
Like some uncultured Turk,
the sinner is impaled on a grand scale,
and we have cars,
1500 and we have culture...
(from a crowd of devils)
Do you drink blood?
Tasteless raw materials!
I took you to the factory before it was too late.
The bourgeoisie distill it for chocolate.
(from a crowd of devils)
Seriously?
And look at the slave from the English colony -
The devils would all run away squeaking.
1510 The blacks are torn off,
tanning leather,
to the bindings so that he can go.
A nail in the ear?
Please, why?
Pork wool is driven under the nails.
Should you look at the soldier in the trench;
compare if with him - your martyr is a quitter.
(from a crowd of devils)
Enough!
The fur stands on end!
1520 These stories make me feel stupefied...
Do you think it's scary?
The fires were lit,
hung chunk_i_.
What the hell are you?
Yes, you are puppies!
Did the belts stretch your joints at the factories?
Beelzebub
(embarrassed)
To a foreign monastery
with its charter.
(pushing Beelzebub)
1530 Say
tell them about the hellish furnace.
Beelzebub
Said -
They don't listen.
There is nothing to cover!
(climbing on)
What, do you only gape at timid mouths?
Beelzebub
Well, by God, are you bothering me?
Damn, like devils!
Compromiser
(trying to separate the devils and the unclean)
Oh my God!
It's starting!
1540 What do you care?
Are two revolutions not enough?
Gentlemen, comrades,
don't make a scandal!
Well, don’t you have any better food?
You can't give up 1550!
You see - an old, venerable devil.
Give up the friction
I have to agree.
Beelzebub
Oh, you sycophant!
Oh, you fox!
The compromiser is being beaten from both sides.
Compromiser
(appeals to the audience)
Citizens!
Well, where is the justice here?
You're calling them to agree,
They will hit you from both sides.
Beelzebub
(sad unclean)
1560 I would invite you to eat bread and salt
what a treat now -
skin and bones.
You know what people are like now -
fry it, it won’t be noticeable on the dish...
They brought in a worker the other day
from cesspools,
If you don’t believe it, there’s nothing to regale you with.
(disgustingly)
Go to hell!
(To the long-impatiently waiting workers.)
1570 Come on, comrades!
The unclean ones moved, Beelzebub clung to the last one.
Beelzebub
Bon Voyage!
Do not forget!
I'm damn knowledgeable -
Get settled -
invite me too
I will be the manager
Glavtopa.
You sit here without eating for five days,
1580 and the devils, it is known,
damn appetite.
The unclean ones moved upward. Broken, clouds fall. Dark. From darkness and rubble
of the empty scene, the following picture emerges. In the meantime, hell is thundering
song of the unclean.
Break through the doors of hell with your bodies!
Purgatory is in tatters!
Forward! Don't be timid!
Purgatory to pieces!
Don't be timid!
We will wean the body from rest.
1590 By tiers!
Walk on the clouds!
Walk through the tiers!
Over the clouds!
(out of nowhere, throws himself on his chest
to Beelzebub)
Beelzebub!
Don't let the lady die alone!
1600 Let me go
let them in!
Let me in, darling!
Because these unclean thugs are such!
Beelzebub
Well!
I'll give you shelter.
Please, madam.
(Points to the door, from behind which two instantly jump out
devil with a pitchfork and drag the lady out. He rubs his hands.)
There is one.
It's always nice to eat a deserter.
ACT FOUR
Paradise. Cloud on cloud. Beleso. In the very middle, sitting like a cloud,
paradise residents. Methuselah speaks.
Methuselah
Holiness!
1610 Go to the brightest relics to recover.
Clean up your days.
Verb Gabriel -
more than a dozen righteous people.
Holiness!
Welcome them into your midst.
Like mice, hunger plays with them,
hell shits on them,
but they wander...
(gradually)
1620 It’s immediately obvious that they are the most worthy people.
We will definitely accept it.
Methuselah
We need to set the table
go out together.
We need to arrange a most solemn meeting.
You are the oldest here and be the master of ceremonies.
Methuselah
Yes, I can't...
OK OK!
Methuselah
(bows, goes to dispose of the table.
Lines up the saints)
Here is Chrysostom.
1630 Prepare a welcome toast:
We, they say, welcome you, and also
Christ...
You know, the books are in your hands.
Here Tolstoy is, -
you look good, decorative,
stood and stood still.
Here - Jean Jacques.
So unfold your enfilade,
I'll go look at the table.
Are you milking the clouds, my son?
1640 Yes, I'm milking.
Methuselah
If you need it, it's on the table.
Slice even
one cloud,
each with a slice.
For the Holy Fathers, the main thing is not food,
and the soul-saving speeches that are at the table
not visible yet?
Some edge of the cloud is blowing suspiciously.
1650 They're coming! They're coming! They're coming! They're coming!
Is it really them?
To heaven, as if the chimney sweeps were dirty.
Hmmm, it turns out there are different saints.
From below comes:
Yell your guns!
Fire your guns!
We are our own Christ and savior!
They tumble in, breaking through the cloud of the floor.
Unclean
Wow, and bearded ones!
About three hundred pieces!
Methuselah
1660 Please, please -
They let the people go crazy!
Drasit, drasit!
Welcome!
Methuselah
Come on, Chrysostom, start making some toast.
Unclean
To hell with Chrysostom!
What kind of toast is this?
when your stomach is empty!
Methuselah
Patience, brothers!
1670 Now,
Now let's feed you enough.
Leads the unclean to a place where there is cloud milk and
cloud bread.
I was being walked around.
Could I have some kind of chair?
Methuselah
not in heaven.
The miracle worker would be pitied -
over there is stooped.
Do not swear.
The main thing is reinforcement of forces.
They pounce on the buckets and edges, at first they are surprised, then,
indignant, they throw away the props.
Methuselah
1680 Have you tasted it?
Taste it, taste it!
Isn’t there something more significant?
Methuselah
Should we not bathe disembodied creatures in wine?
Unclean
We are waiting for you, damned ones,
we die humbly.
If only people knew what was ahead!
At our place
such paradises
at least a dime a dozen.
Methuselah
(pointing to the saint to whom the blacksmith was shouting)
1690 Don't yell, it's inconvenient.
Angelic rank.
It would be better to talk to the rank:
This is not how we imagined it.
A real hole!
And it doesn't look like heaven.
Shoemaker
Yes, my dears,
made it to heaven!
1700 Well, I’ll tell you, hole, I am.
So, are you sitting here like this?
One of the angels
Happens on the ground too
to go to a righteous brother or sister -
and we return, pouring out our oil there:
So are you feathers in the clouds and fluttering?
We should get an elevator.
Second angel
And we embroider marks on the clouds, -
1710 X. and V. -
Christ's initials.
You could also gnaw on sunflowers.
Provincials!
If only they had visited me on earth.
I would wean lazy people away from laziness.
They sing here:
"Away with the tyrants, away with the fetters."
And they will get to you
don't look how high you are.
1720 Just like in St. Petersburg:
the population is crowded,
the food is eaten.
Unclean
You're bored.
Oh, and boring!
Methuselah
What can you do, that’s the way our system is,
It is, of course,
a lot of things are not landscaped, sir.
Intellectual
(looks first at Leo Tolstoy, then at Jean Jacques,
refers to the latter)
I'm watching everything
1730 and to Lev Nikolaevich.
What familiar faces!
Are you Jean Jacques Rousseau?
It takes my breath away with joy!
Did you write about brotherhood, about equality, about freedom?
Did you write the Social Contract?
Have mercy!
1740 Yes, I know you by heart
from now on!
Allow me to express my respects.
More than anything in the world I love liberal
reader.
I won't go anywhere.
So I'll stay here.
Let these uncultured unclean ones go,
I'll keep you talking for a while.
"Social contract"...
1750 How to get out of here?
Methuselah
Ask Gabriel.
Which Gabriel?
All as one!
Methuselah
(proudly stroking his beard)
Well don't tell me
there is also a difference -
Here, for example, the length of a beard is s.
Unclean
Why talk?
This institution is not for us.
Compromiser
1760 Tsh, tsh!
Comrades! Agree!
Put aside your differences!
Well, doesn't it matter what class I'm in?
(To the angels.)
Look,
what guys!
on your site
I would be only too glad:
the best part of society -
1770 proletariat!
(Unclean.)
You are good too!
Just think what rank he is!
(Pointing to Methuselah.)
This is not Wrangel -
Methuselah
Do you agree with this?
God forbid!
I agree with you!
Looked out too!
Compromiser
Trying your best
1780 and it turns out disgusting.
Double-sided overlay again!
I still agree -
and I will give up the ghost.
To the promised one!
Look beyond paradise!
Let's take our steps forward to paradise!
1790 At least the whole universe is grown up!
Methuselah
(looking at paradise being destroyed by the unclean, he cried out
Grab it!
Break them apart with lightning and God Almighty!
At terrible thunder appears in the clouds with a beam of lightning himself
Yes, I will thunder at you!
Red Army soldier
(reproachfully)
As children -
took it and complained to my mother.
With a distorted face, seeing an unprecedented scandal brewing,
the compromiser squealed.
Compromiser
1800 Hosts himself!
My legs gave way!
(Unclean.)
Come to your senses!
Agree!
Against God!
(shows fist to compromiser)
If only I were not all-good,
I would show you such a compromise!..
agree with God?
Your agreement will backfire!
They're pushing the compromiser.
Compromiser
(tearful, but with respect)
I can't vouch for your conviction.
Well, and a fist!
I agree a little more
and the Menshevik varnish will come off from me.
Driver
(pointing to Sabaoth, waving arrows of lightning, not wanting to shoot them at
move for fear of offending their own Methuselahs)
We need to snatch lightning from God.
1820 Will come in handy -
electrify.
There is no point in blaring thunder in vain!
They rush and pull out lightning.
(sadly)
Ripped off!
No feather, no fluff!
Methuselah
How should we cover sinners now?
The unclean destroy paradise, rising up with lightning.
The dawn flares up -
1830 We'll all break our fast there...
But when they reached the top through the rubble, he interrupted the blacksmith
Why feed the hungry dawn!
We break, we break, we break
Isn't it time for them?
Will it be soon, will it be soon?
Will we find ourselves in a new hell?
They fooled us!
(Thinking.)
Go chimney sweep! Go, spy!
From the darkness of the ruins of paradise a new picture emerges. From those going forward
the unclean ones are separated by a thoughtful compromiser.
Compromiser
Passed through heaven
went through hell
and everyone goes.
Should I at least go back?
Good people are angelic offspring.
1850 seems to be a little agreed upon.
Let them go, if they are not too lazy,
(waves his hand after the departing unclean ones)
and I'll be back
to Tolstoy.
non-resistance
ACT FIVE
Why did you stop?
1860 Touch!
Lamplighter
You won't get through
the mountains piled up on the road.
Is it possible to go down this road?
In three years, how much debris was piled up!
They look at the wreckage.
Look, it's a piece of the ark.
Red Army soldier
Negusa Abyssinian remains.
Shoemaker
A piece of heaven.
Hell's shard.
Lamplighter
What to do?
1870 It’s not like going, -
there is nowhere to sit.
What to do? What to do?
It needs to be cleared.
So, there is nothing to think about here:
get organized, comrade,
and get to work!
Red Army soldier
The organization of the organization is discordant.
First you need
chart the right path.
1880 In my opinion, take the organization
and shake it up.
(annoyed)
threw out my knee!
Nonsense shake-up!
We need appointees.
(perky)
Appointment...
Here's your time!
Buffers are needed, sir.
The unclean ones huddled together, shouting at each other.
And in my opinion,
1890 is all -
not according to Marxist dogma and form.
on a completely different platform:
I want to save working Rus',
break the bonds of poverty and hunger.
(hopelessly)
The discussion is on!
(separating the attackers)
Comrades,
There are no trade unions here.
Driver
1900 Buffers?!
It didn't hit the eye, but the eyebrow:
a laundress with buffers,
and a locomotive without wheels, let alone without buffers.
We're drowning in conversations
the ford is not visible.
Through a pile of newspapers -
get to work!
Why spread a river of words?
1910 Let's shovel!
Let's swing the pickaxe!
(raking up the rubble)
waved once,
and I'll wave again.
What's the bill?
He waved once,
I'll swing again!
Compromiser
(appearing from a cloud with the inscription: "Berlin")
Comrades,
1920 stop working!
You understand
I won’t advise in vain, -
I can see everything from my foreign paradise.
Stop working, dear people,
Absolutely nothing will come of this!
Agree with me...
He stuck out his face -
so that the hammer does not accidentally whistle
Compromiser
(Immediately smelled the cloud.)
(stopped with pickaxe raised)
Comrades,
listen!
Some howl!
Debris
someone is pinned down
Run howl!
At the end of his words they dig with tenfold force, and from the clouds
a locomotive and a steamship are shown.
Hear the locomotive groan!
Don't breathe!
Don't separate the steam!
Black bread from the Don
Let me eat!
Driver
you won't die.
1950 friend, be calm.
We will tear coal out of the earth's bowels,
Let's take you to a new path.
Let me drink the source of the rivers!
Holes in every side!
Take me to the docks!
Give me oil from Baku!
Hey comrades,
1960 is behind me!
Why did you fold your hands?
under the vault of the earth!
For oil!
Don't leave the oil-bearing vein!
Raise your pickaxe!
Stand up as a drummer, brah!
Hit it harder!
Stick a drill into the ground!
1970 Back!
Why are they making threshing noises?
Back! Who argues with me
with devastation?
I reign here -
Queen of Destruction:
I'm eating a locomotive
I'm eating the car.
As I blow -
I'll blow the factory away.
1980 How to blow -
I'll blow the plant away like feathers.
I'll just take a look -
and the cast iron doesn't work.
and the iron path has been swallowed up.
And the city writhes in hunger
and in the cold,
the village is dying from the cold
and from hunger.
1990 Back!
I hate vigorous work.
I will deal with you in my own way.
Come to me, my army, selfish people, quitters!
Come to me, the faithful army of speculators!
The “army” surrounds the devastation.
Why are they making threshing noises?
Who argues with her?
2000 with devastation?
Bow down! I am your queen - devastation,
I will tie your throats tight with hunger.
Enough!
The queen would be hammered!
Arm yourself!
(falls into ruin)
Fight for coal!
(On the bagmen.)
We rode on horseback in a carriage,
enough!
2010 We'll get everyone to work.
Catch the selfish people!
Down with the quitters!
Let's get to work!
Work until you're stupefied!
The unclean ones have moved, and the “army” is retreating.
(undermined by destruction)
Should we bend our necks under the devastation?
Comrades!
Blow up the mine trenches!
Trenches are furrows on the surface of the meadow.
Farmhand and miner
Our weapon is
2020 bread and coal.
(they are finishing off the devastation. The end of the speech is on the broken
Let's run!
Devastation is surrendering!
the last blow remains...
Enough!
Free entry -
2030 door to the future.
(Indicates the descent into the mine.)
hammer down face after face.
"And it will be
last
and a decisive battle."
(brings a trolley with coal)
First Podmoskovny.
Let's get busy -
climb on the jack.
Driver
(rolls a barrel of oil)
Here from Baku
take the gifts.
there is no hole in the side.
(another trolley)
Here are gifts for you from Donbass.
Now I will divorce the couples.
Driver
(another barrel)
2050 Here they rolled out the tank for you.
Now the engines are starting.
Driver
(another barrel)
Here's another gift for you from Ukhta.
(another trolley)
Here's the Ural for you.
Steamboat and locomotive
The wheels are running.
Now I’ll walk along the reaches.
Unclean ones run out of the mine holes and attack each other.
Driver
2060 And I’m coming to you.
And I'm coming to you.
And I'm coming to you.
And I'm coming to you.
Red Army soldier
Extraordinary!
Incredible!
Fantastic news!
There, behind the last tower...
Miner and driver
there is something.
2070 This is my last slaughter...
Driver
I roll the last barrel in front of me...
far, far away...
Driver
far, far away...
Where the eye barely reaches...
I hear singing
wheels rumble,
2080 factories breathing measured...
Driver
I see the sun
early dawn,
city, probably.
Red Army soldier
We seem to have won.
We seem to
into the bosom of true paradise.
The locomotive is ready.
2090 The steamer is ready.
Driver
Get in.
Let's rush into the future.
Red Army soldier
(climbs onto the locomotive, followed by others)
Even the path
smooth and clean.
Be the first -
Go ahead, driver!
To the waves!
On the rails!
2100 Obtained by labor,
he's close
future joyful home.
Eat up space
breathing into the car.
Only by car
step into the future.
Swipe after swing!
Step by step!
(repeats)
2110 Breathing into all the machines.
ACT SIX
Promised land. Huge gate. Some corners from which it is weak
streets and squares of earthly areas are outlined. There are some rainbows above the gate,
roofs, flowers are exorbitant. There's a spy at the gate, calling out excitedly
climbing.
Here, comrades!
Land your troops!
The unclean ones rise up and look over the gates with terrible surprise.
But this is Ivanovo-Voznesensk!
Pretty miracles!
How can you trust crooks, I ask you?
Yes, this is not Voznesensk -
believe honor.
2120 This is Marseille.
Shoemaker
And in my opinion, Shuya.
Not Shuya at all.
This is Manchester.
Driver
Shame on you for being so stupid!
What kind of Manchester is this?
This is Moscow.
How did everyone go blind?
Look, Tverskaya,
here is Sadovaya,
2130 here is the theater of the RSFSR.
Moscow, Manchester, Shuya -
not in this case:
The main thing -
found ourselves on the ground again,
again at the same corner.
The damned earth is round,
oh, and it’s round!
Earth, but not the same!
In my opinion,
2140 for earth
Doesn't it smell a little like slop?
What's that in the air
Is some kind of sweetness brittled?
Shoemaker
Apricots?
And it’s almost like it’s time for autumn.
They raise their heads. The rainbow hits your eyes.
Red Army soldier
Come on, lamplighter,
you with the ladder, -
2150 just take a look.
Lamplighter
(climbs and stops, frozen, just mumbles)
We are fools!
Well, fools!
Red Army soldier
Yes, tell me!
Looks like the goose is catching lightning!
Tell us!
Lamplighter
tongue-tied!
2160 Give me
give me a hundred-verst pagan.
Make the rays of the sun brighter and cleaner,
so as not to hang like a rag,
to be trumpeted by the lyre,
so that this tongue is rocked by jewelers,
so that the nightingales carry words from their mouths...
And then you won’t tell a damn thing!
Houses cover a hundred floors of land!
2170 Through the houses
jump over deft bridges!
Under houses
Things in a mountain.
On the bridges
trains' slipping tails!
Lamplighter
Yes, tails!
2180 electric eyes rolled out!
In these eyes
million-horsepower engines
The earth shines and shines!
Lamplighter
Yes, it is shining!
Red Army soldier
We worked ourselves.
Why is he surprised?
Driver
2190 Work - worked,
but still I can’t believe it,
what a miracle is
behind the work is.
Stop lying!
An acacia tree has never given birth to a fig.
Lamplighter
Stop talking!
2200 electrification!
Electrification?
Lamplighter
electrification.
Plugs are inserted into the fattened plugs.
Driver
No scientists will believe it.
Lamplighter
An electric tractor is coming!
Electric seeder!
Electric thresher!
2210 And in a second
already baked.
Lamplighter
Baker
And the hostess is overdressed,
and the owner is pug-shaped -
walk around the city, damaging the sidewalks?
Lamplighter
2220 no one can be seen from here.
I didn't notice anything of this kind.
Sugar Loaf!
What should I do?
I didn’t have time to attach the cards before the flood.
Yes, speak at least a little more in detail!
Lamplighter
Yes there are all kinds
2230 dishes,
Each one has a pen
each has a leg.
Factories in flags.
A mile away.
Wherever the gaze of the hundred feet wanders -
are without work
2240 machine.
Unclean
(restless)
Out of employment?
And here we are skillful in verbal sports!
Maybe it will rain
ruin the cars!
Break in!
Lamplighter
(rolling down)
Lamplighter
Things are moving forward.
The gates swing open and the city reveals itself. But what a city! Pile up
the sky is open to the colossus of transparent factories and apartments. Entwined with rainbows, they stand
trains, trams, cars, and in the middle - a garden of stars and moons, crowned
shining crown of the sun. The best things come out of the windows and,
led by the hammer and sickle, they go to the gate with bread and salt. By
to the numb rows of huddled unclean ones:
Unclean
Ahhhhhhhhh!
Ha ha ha ha ha!
What's your owner's name?
No owners.
2260 We are no one's.
We are delegates.
Hammer and sickle
meets you -
Republic coat of arms.
And for whom is the bread?
Sugarloaf?
Are you meeting the governor, or what?
He will lie!
Not small children.
It must be
sold under the counter.
Must be
speculator on speculator.
2280 No speculators, -
Will be stored in the IPC
and in a year they will give out a tablespoon.
They don't put us anywhere.
Take at least a pound.
We must be sleeping.
Dream inventions.
2290 like this
sat in the gallery.
There's a ball on stage.
Traviata.
and it seemed so bitter
2300 This won’t get away from you now, -
this is the earth.
It will fool you!
What a land this is!
The earth is dirt
earth - nights.
If you work hard on the ground, you will open your mouth,
and the fat one will come and take away what he has worked.
2310 I guess
will bite.
100,000 rubles, which must be 100,000 teeth
on every pood.
Driver
Fits!..
Mouse gait.
Little has been done to us by the car!
You just have to grow teeth on the workers.
Sorry, worker!
2320 Worker, sorry!
You brought us together
And they took us away
enslaved
Move, car, wave, colossus.
Steel tirelessly
steel without rest, -
We were told to carry fat people on tires,
2330 were ordered to work for them in factories.
Shaft on shaft
you for centuries
they tore with belts,
flywheels.
Yell, engines,
great joy -
the fat ones were knocked down,
From now on I am free!
Honk through the factories, moving the wheels,
2340 circles into the railway lines.
The world is carouseling,
shine in the black night
you from here
we will, workers.
And we, and we, are helpful things!
We are hammers, needles, saws and tongs.
Only the day will be marked with a yellow stripe,
bending under us, you walked to the factories.
Now the owner's clique has dealt with them,
2350 we will plan and forge everything for you.
whose back was breaking under us,
We surrender to your mercy today.
In the spacious forge of the new paradise
Raise the hammer while playing with a toy.
And we are goods, drink and food:
We bring countless troubles to the workers.
Without bread there is no human power,
Without sugar there is no human sweetness.
2360 Barely obtained by human labor,
It was not you who ate us, but we who ate you with rubles.
With my mouth open at the price of a million,
we barked dogs from shop windows.
Yes, you shouted to the parasites: get down!
And from now on bread and sweets are free.
Everything that was looked at with a grinding noise before,
take it today, cut it and eat it.
Cars, things and food
Take yours
2370 Go!
Everything to work with
everything you eat!
Go get it!
Go, winner!
It must be necessary to present a mandate.
We have no mandates
we're straight from heaven
and before that from hell.
2380 no mandates are needed.
The leg is not a razor, -
maybe we won't step.
Let's try it, brothers!
The unclean ones step.
(touches the ground)
Dear earthling!
I wish I could sing now!
Scream!
2390 Pray!
Baker
(carpenter)
Sugar -
I licked it.
Baker
Sweet, just sweet.
Now there will be no sweetness with fun!
Comrades things,
you know what?
Enough of torturing fate!
Come on, we will make you,
2400 and you feed us.
If the owner imposes himself, we won’t let him out alive!
(pushing the crowd, indignant, jumps out)
No matter how it is!
Know your limits!
Something must be left for the concessionaire.
Get out!
Your work is finished, -
I worked for 2410 children to earn money for milk.
They wanted to borrow your knowledge -
turned out,
It's time and honor to know.
Thrown out, the merchant flies out. The unclean ones look greedily
I'd take a saw. Stagnant. Young.
And I'm an igloo b.
The hand is impatient - give us the hammer!
Take it! Pigeon!
Unclean things and machines surround the sunny garden in a ring.
Driver
(to cars)
I would let you in.
2420 Won't you rush in, growling?
Turn the lever!
The driver turns the lever. The balls caught fire. The wheels started spinning.
The unclean ones look on in delighted amazement.
Driver
I've never seen such light!
This is not land -
with a tail trains a burning comet.
Why were the oxen mooing under the jugular?
2430 waited for years -
and never noticed
Such grace is at hand.
Why do people go into museums?
Living treasure on treasure all around!
What is this - heaven or a piece of paper?
If it's our doing,
then what door will not open before us?
We are the architects of the lands,
planet decorators,
2440 we are miracle workers,
let's tie the rays with bunches of brooms,
so that the clouds of heaven can be swept away with electricity.
We will spill the rivers of the worlds in honey,
We will pave the earthly streets with stars.
2450 Hurray for everyone!
these are just fake doors,
reality will be replaced by theatrical rubbish.
We know that.
We believe in it.
Here, viewer!
Here, artist!
2460 Director!
All spectators rise to the stage.
All in unison
Sun worshipers at the world in the temple -
Let's show how we can sing.
Become choirs -
Psalms to the future!
Out of nowhere, the compromiser looks at the commune in surprise;
Realizing what's going on, he politely takes off his hat.
Compromiser
there is no place for an energetic person in heaven,
I don’t like these lean snouts.
Socialism is inevitable -
I've always said this.
(Unclean.)
Singing must be agreed upon.
(He steps aside and quietly conducts with his pen.
The blacksmith pushes it aside politely.)
Unclean
Millions of labor
We broke the prison of old things.
Branded with the curse of slavery,
The world is liberated today.
The oppression of violence is dispelled into dust,
broken and blown up, and now
The fairy tale commune became reality,
The door to all communes is wide open.
2480 This anthem is our victory,
whole universe, sing!
With the International
the human race has risen.
We did not wait for salvation from above.
Neither God nor the devil stood up for us.
Squeezing his weapon, he went into battle
and the working class wrested power.
We have merged the world into one commune.
The whole world has surrounded the working circle.
2490 Now go try it, tear it out
it from our clenched hands.
This anthem is our victory,
whole universe, sing!
With the International
the human race has risen.
The memory of the past will forever disappear.
If the bourgeoisie don't stand up, it's a blow.
We own the land now
soldiers of the army of labor.
2500 Here from factories and arable lands,
from the cities and here to the villages!
The land is ours from end to end,
who was nothing is everything today.
This anthem is our victory,
whole universe, sing!
With the International
the human race has risen.
PROLOGUE AND INSERT TO THE SECOND OPTION
"MYSTERIES-BUFF",
WRITTEN FOR A PERFORMANCE IN HONOR
III CONGRESS OF THE COMINTERN
PROLOGUE
Comrades!
You, who represent the world,
Messengers of the All-World Commune, -
we welcome:
rev comedians,
roar-painters,
roar songwriters,
10 to your countries
more to come
blown up to fly -
America,
manages to see
20 features of the Commune, rising above fantasies.
Everything that was won in battle on the field,
everything that is protested in every possible way,
in this circus we will reflect,
like in a drop
The bourgeoisie will also pass,
and Menshevik hysteria,
Blow away obstacles in peace!
30 Proletarian MYSTERY river
and the bourgeoisie of the BUFF.
Equal to Revolutions are explosions of plays.
Satire is like a strike -
grabs you by the belly.
Comrade actors!
Words at the ready!
INSERT INTO ACT II TEXT
Compromiser
Agree to the Second International.
Wonderful thing!
Moderately black
moderately white,
moderately yellow,
in moderation al.
Kautsky,
and then they agreed, -
10 smartest people, after all...
Unclean
Compromiser
take the International two-half.
I won’t give up a single gold coin again!
Tea, German Social Democrats are not children,
Levi himself recognized it, -
after all, a politician.
Unclean
Down with them!
We don’t want to know any others!
Compromiser
take two and 3/4.
Last price.
More precious to yourself!..
And don’t you want that too?!
Unclean
Enough!
To hell with this talk!
Among the workers
one International -
30 Third!
LIBRETTO "MYSTERY-BUFF"
FOR THE PERFORMANCE PROGRAM IN HONOR OF THE III CONGRESS OF THE COMINTERN
"MYSTERY-BUFF"
Heroic, epic and satirical image our era,
made by Vladimir Mayakovsky, translated by Rita Wright and acted out by 350
actors.
"Mystery-buff" is ours great revolution, condensed with verse and
theatrical action. Mystery is the great thing in the revolution, buffet is the funny thing in it.
The verse "Mysteries-bouffe" is the slogans of rallies, the cries of the streets, the language of the newspaper.
The action of "Mystery-bouffe" is the movement of the crowd, the clash of classes, the struggle
ideas - a miniature of the world within the walls of the circus.
The revolution melted everything - there are no completed drawings, it cannot
be a finished play. "Mystery-bouffe" is the framework of the play, this is the movement,
daily enriched with events, daily passing through new facts.
In the latest version of "Mystery-bouffe", staged for the III Congress
Comintern, six acts and a prologue-greeting.
Act one. The whole world. The world will be overwhelmed by the streams of revolution.
The only dry place is the pole. But there is already a hole in the pole. Barely a hole
plugs the Eskimo with his finger. Flock to the pole, driven by the stream, the remnants
population of the world: seven pairs of pure - bourgeois, seven pairs of unclean - proletarians,
a compromiser who gets confused among everyone, and others. Spurred by the rain, everyone
crowded towards the pole and, when there was not enough space, shot down an Eskimo holding
hole. The fire of revolution from the opened hole. They rushed in and somehow covered it up.
The pure persuade the unclean to take up salvation. The unclean are building an ark.
Second action. Travel in the ark. Behind the formation the formation changes to
deck. Monarchy of the Negus Abyssinian. Then - a democratic republic
clean. Finally, the clean ones are thrown overboard. The hungry unclean ones took power.
The unclean ones want to eat, they want to rest, but the ark is empty and broken.
The last reserves were gobbled up by the democratic republic. Then in the form of a man
The future illuminates the ark with the need to fight for the creation of a commune. Unclean
throw the breaking ark and with the only faith in its own strength from the masts and
rays break through the clouds. "Hey, on the yards! On the yards, hey! Along the yards forward,
Commissars of the Seas!"
Third action. The hell erected by the priests blocks the path of the unclean, but
no Beelzebub scares the unclean ones seen in the steel mills
the heat was worse than hell. To the song: “Break through the doors of hell with your bodies, purgatory is in
shreds, go ahead, don’t be timid!” - the unclean are spreading hell.
Fourth act. Paradise. The disembodied life of God, which deceives
preachers of afterlife joys and all supporters of quiet reforms. Not like that
wounds awaited those walking. Through the destroyed paradise the unclean are crawling forward. "TO
the promised one, look beyond paradise! Walk! Let's build paradise in strides!"
Fifth act. A country of rubble, inherited by the unclean after wars and
revolutions. It is necessary to raise construction sites on the destroyed site. Devastation is trying
crush the work. Devastation has been defeated. From coal mines, from oil rigs
The unclean ones are already able to notice the dawn of the future. To the locomotive - and to it: "Wave
by stroke, by step. Forward, breathing into all the cars!"
Sixth act. Commune. The unclean rejoice and marvel at the first miracles
the future that opened beyond the mountains of labor. New Victory International
The unclean ones divulged their joy:
This anthem is our victory,
Whole universe, sing!
With the International
The human race has risen.
OPTIONS and DIFFERENCES
Mystery-buff. Second option
Rough passages in the notebook of 1921, No. 8:
Lines 586-589, 590-595.
586-589 [I drink milk
I haven't licked it for a long time
There is a lot of it on the market now
Substitute an empty pocket instead of a lid
590-595 You're the one who's going to get enough without milk, you fool
and they have a bonus, they have a nature
They will exchange it
I should at least exchange hats for eggs.
Typescript. Early 1921:
On the list characters: 8) Herr is German.
1-96 (Prologue) are missing.
In the remark between 176-177... sweaty Australians
" " 212-213 ... throws his fist at the Frenchman
" " 213-214 ... throws his fist at the Englishman
229 I’m sitting calmly on a chair
257 The Nile, the river boa constrictor, wriggled in it
297 Russia has become narrow to me.
In the remark between 342-343 The approaching fire of the unclean
399 Your word, intellectual!
In the stage directions between 483 and 484... an American bursts in.
" " 491-492 The clean ones fuss, ingratiatingly rub against the unclean
493 Shall we build it?
571 and you’ll almost die from hunger
587-598 remained the Smolensk market.
Compromiser
What market
one glory, -
daily raid.
639-640 Everyone (surprised)
Why a king?
Compromiser
Better than a policeman
650 Let's choose quickly!
In the remark between 673 and 674 ... they change pestles
699 fish, bread, vegetables, pork
Remark between 710 and 711 General
In the remark between 727 and 728, he drives the unclean into the hold and while he is busy
728 Let's go, Lloyd George.
913 Republic something
942 I agree with you!
1011 is missing.
1044 is missing.
In the remark between 1077-1078 ... climbs with a pipe
1080-1081 rips out the phone
1130 how difficult it is to live from hand to mouth
1486 I will take you to the ground for a minute.
1505 Bourgeois distill it for chocolate.
In a remark between 1595-1596 ... on the chest of the taken aback Beelzebub.
1808-1809 If only I were not all-good,
I would show you the agreements
1814-1815 What a fist!
I can't vouch for your conviction.
Absent between 1863 and 1864: Seamstress
1900-1903 What's the use of a professional discussion, dear
Bukharin with buffers,
a locomotive without wheels, or else
that without buffers.
1905 we don’t see the ford.
1920 stop working in vain!
1923 I don’t care from a foreign paradise.
1995 Come to me, faithful army of bagmen!
1999 Who argues with me,
2046 There are no holes in the sides.
2188-2193 are missing.
2207 An electric tractor is coming!
2208 Seeder!
2209 Thresher!
2283 Will be placed in MPO
2484-2507 are missing.
Appendix to the journal. "Theatre Bulletin", No. 91-92, 1921;
Subtitle from the first edition.
In the remark between 176-177 ... sweaty Australians
" " 212 and 213 ... climbs with a fist on the Frenchman
" " 213 and 214 ... climbs with a fist on the Englishman
229 I’m sitting calmly in a chair
493 Shall we build it?
650 Let's choose quickly!
" " 727 and 728 Drives the unclean into the hold and while
fiddling with them
728 Let's go, Lloyd George.
942 I agree with you!
1595 and 1596 ... on the chest of the taken aback
Beelzebub
In the remark between 2469 and 2470 (To the unclean.)
Rough sketches of additions to the text of the second version in a notebook
book of 1921, No. 9. (Probably made after the premiere of the play. Were they
introduced into the stage text - unknown.)
Their supposed place in the play is “Act Three” (Hell.)
Is this torment for a sinner?
spinning on a spit?
I You are a sinner
to get boots-b on a warrant
II Make him order boots-b
I That would make him
II This would surely kill the sinner
You think they probably scared you
Twisted tail
We have cleaner tails on earth
Everyone is standing not with tails, but with tails
Here you are a smart guy in the face - once,
I cut a piece of lamb into a fork
And we have warrants, sir
And we have papers
In the meantime, they organized Soviet power
We also suffered to our heart's content
Now their party has pinned them down
and Soviet bureaucrat
calmed down a hundred times
And if we have such a practice
Then we can handle you too, of course.
His Greatness<ество>Beelzebub
asks to be called to Glavtop
Give up hope, you've cut yourself short
Draft autographs of inserts into the text of the second version for the performance in
honor of the delegates of the 111th Congress of the Communist International. Note
book 1921, M 9.
Lines from the "Prologue" 10-25, 1-9.
3 Lands of the Rising Heralds
10-20 to your countries
still to fly into the air
explode with the Americas and Asia
can we
and step back and take a look
the story growing on<д>fantasies
21-25 Everything that was won in battle on the field
everything that the squares protested in every way
will now pass in front of you
like a drop of water
Insertion into the text of Act II - dialogue between the Compromiser and the Unclean Ones.
There are no characters.
1 Agree
2 is missing.
3-4 moderately white
moderately black
3 and in moderation
11-12 are missing.
13 Take the second one
15-17 nor children
no way either
political figure
Belov's autograph of insertions into the text of the second version for the performance in
honor of the delegates of the Third Congress of the Communist International.
32-37 are missing from the Prologue.
Insertion into the text of Act II. Dialogue of the Compromiser with the Unclean Ones.
11 I Down with them
we don't want to know anyone else
15 [The Lion Himself<и>] Tea German Social Democrats are not
"13 years of work", vol. II:
There is no subtitle.
In the remark between 176 and 177...wet Australians
650 Let's choose quickly!
In the remark between 673 and 674 ... they change positions
" 727 and 728 Drives the unclean into the hold
and while he's fiddling with them
In the remark between 1080 and 1081 ... pulls out the pipe
In the remark between 2469 and 2470 (To the unclean.)
1826 is missing.
Remark after 1826 Unclean (breaking paradise, rising
skyward with lightning)
NOTES
LIFETIME EDITIONS OF V. MAYAKOVSKY’S WORKS INCLUDED IN THE SECOND VOLUME
era, made by Vladimir Mayakovsky, 3 acts, 5 scenes, "IMO", P.
1918, 79 pp.
Heroes and victims of the revolution. October 1917-1918. Drawings: Boguslavskaya,
Kozlinsky, Makletsov, Puki. Text by Vladimir Mayakorkhky, Department publication
Fine Arts of the Commissariat of People's Education, P. 1918, 19 p.
Mystery-buff. A heroic, epic and satirical depiction of our
era, made by Vladimir Mayakovsky, 2nd edition, ed. "IMO", P. 1919, 71
pp. (published in April).
Everything composed by Vladimir Mayakovsky 19 09-1919, ed. "IMO", P. 1919,
280 pp. (published in May).
Soviet alphabet, edition and lithographic print of the author, M. 1919, 30
pp. (published in September).
150,000,000, Guise, M. 1921, 70 pp. (published in May).
Mystery-buff. (Second edition.) Supplement to the journal "Vestnik"
Theater", No. 91-92, published by Glavpolitprosvet, M. 1921, 32 pp. (June).
The story of a deserter. Drawings by Mayakovsky, Guise, M. 1921, 16 pp.
Mayakovsky is mocking. The first book of satire, ed. "Vkhutemas", M. 1922,
MAF, Series of Poets No. 3, 48 pp. (published in May).
Mayakovsky is mocking. The first little book of satire, 2nd edition, ed.
"Vkhutemas", M. 1922, MAF. Series of poets Љ 3, 48 pp. (published in July).
13 years of work. First volume, ed. "Vkhutemas", M. 1922, MAF, 304 pp.
(published February 1923).
13 years of work. Second volume. Part one, ed. "Vkhutemas", M. 1922, MAF,
464 pp. (published in October).
Selected Mayakovsky, ed. acc. total "On the Eve", Berlin - Moscow, 1923,
256 pp. (published in February).
Mayakovsky smiles, Mayakovsky laughs, Mayakovsky mocks, ed.
"Circle", M.-P. 1923, 190 pp. (published in April).
Poems about the revolution, ed. "Red Nov", M. 1923, 98 pp. (published in
Poems about revolution. 2nd, add. edition, ed. "Krasnaya Nov", M. 1923, 124
pp. (published in August).
Sun. Poem. [Poem " An Extraordinary Adventure, formerly with
Vladimir Mayakovsky in the summer at the dacha"], publishing house "Krug", M.-P. 1923, 23 pp.
Cover and drawings by Larionov.
255 pages. Book I, Guise, M.-P. 1923 (published in July).
A tale about a deserter who got a good job, and what fate
befell him and the selfish family, ed. "Red Nov", M. 1923, 13 pp.
Drawings by Mayakovsky.
Two poems ( educational work graphic faculty of Vkhutemas),
M. 1924, 20 pp.
Songs for Peasants, ed. "Down with illiteracy", M. 1925, 167 pp.
Songs for workers, ed. "Down with illiteracy", M. 1925, 98 pp.
Americans for Memory, ed. New Wardle Press, New York, 1925, 52 pp.
The Sun visiting Mayakovsky, ed. "New Word Press", New York, 1925,
32 pp. [Poem "An extraordinary adventure that happened to Vladimir
Mayakovsky summer at the dacha."]
Selected from selected, ed. "Ogonyok", M. 1926, 54 pp.
Works, vol. II, Guise, M.-L. 1928, 364 pp.
Works, vol. III, Guise, M.-L. 1929, 448 pp. (published in January).
Works, vol. IV, Guise, M.-L. 1929, 382 pp.
School Mayakovsky, Guise, M.-L., 104 pp. 1929 (published in September).
Terrible laughter, Gihl, M. 1932, 180 pp. (prepared by the author).
ACCEPTED ABBREVIATIONS
BMM - Library-Museum of V. V. Mayakovsky.
TsGALI - Central State Archives literature and art of the USSR.
IMLI - Institute of World Literature named after. A. M. Gorky Academy of Sciences
Mystery-buff. Second option. Rough autographs of several passages in
notebook 1921, No. 8 (BMM); typescript without copyright edits
1921 (kept by A.V. Fevralsky). The first edition is a supplement to the journal.
text, excerpts of the prologue and inserts in Act II for the performance in honor
delegates of the III Congress of the Communist International in a notebook
1921, No. 9 (BMM); white autograph of the prologue and insertion into Act II (BMM);
typescript of the prologue and insertion into Act II (kept by A.V. Fevralsky);
Works, vol. III.
The second version was written more than two years after the first due to
inclusion of the play in the repertoire of the Moscow Theater of the RSFSR First, led by
Sun. Meyerhold. Started in October 1920, completed in December 1920 - early
January 1921
In collected works (two-volume “13 years of work” and Works, vol. III)
Mayakovsky published both versions side by side as two independent works.
In this edition, the following lines are printed according to the text of the journal.
"Theater Bulletin".
Lines 296-298.
At first she was Russian, -
Russia has become narrow to me.
These Bolsheviks are such a horror!
At first she was Russian.
These Bolsheviks are such a horror!
After line 363 is printed:
(Angrily. Both the fisherman and the Frenchman crutch the neck of the compromiser.)
(Both the fisherman and the Frenchman crutch the neck of the compromiser.)
Remark after line 483:
Straight from the hall to those watching intently,
instead of: Directly to those intently peering.
Lines 1825-1826:
We'll have to close the shop completely.
How should we cover sinners now?
Lines 2265-2266.
And for whom is the bread?
And for whom is bread?
Moscow Theater of the RSFSR First. The performance ran after that every day until
In the last days of June 1921 in Moscow it was carried out
special production of the second version of the play in honor of the delegates 111
Congress of the Communist International. The play was on German V
translation by Rita Wright, in the premises of the First State Circus. In the play
Actors invited from various Moscow theaters took part.
For this performance, Mayakovsky wrote a new prologue, directly
addressed to representatives of the international proletariat, a new epilogue and
dialogue between the “compromiser” and the “unclean ones”.
Mayakovsky also wrote a libretto for the play, published (without signature) in
program of the performance. The prologue and dialogue between the “compromiser” and the “unclean” are printed
according to typewritten text. The text of the epilogue has not survived.
The prologue and epilogue of the “compromiser” with the “evil ones” were first published in
Full collection cit., vol. III, Gihl, M. 1934
"Mystery-bouffe" in the second version was staged in 1921 in Tomsk,
Perm (Molotov), Tambov, Yekaterinburg (Sverdlovsk), Krasnodar,
Kharkov, Omsk; in 1922 - in Irkutsk, Krasnoyarsk; in 1923 - in Moscow and in
three theaters in Kazan.
Hosts is the biblical name for god.
Line 118. Friedrichstrasse is a street in Berlin.
Line 124. Scheidemann - German politician, representative
right-wing social democrats. During the November Revolution of 1918 in Germany and
then during his stay in the provisional government - a traitor
of the German proletariat.
Line 132. Alley of Victories - see page 493.
Line 133. The Hohenzollerns are the dynasty of the last German emperors.
Line 151 ...is it from Foch, or from... - meaning an attack on
Germany, undertaken in 1918 by the armies of the Entente, under the overall command
French Marshal Foch, as well as what broke out in November 1918 in Germany
revolutionary workers' movement.
Line 213. Vive la France! - (French: vive la France!) - long live
Line 217. Imperial - Russian ancient gold coin.
Line 276. Lloyd George - see page 501.
Line 573. Nikolaevki - the colloquially used name for the royal
paper money issued under Nicholas II.
Line 585. Sukharevka is a common name for one of the large
Moscow markets that existed on Sukhareva (now Kolkhoznaya) Square.
"Sukharevka" was one of the main centers of speculation, and at the end of 1920 this
the market was closed.
Clemenceau - see page 502.
years of the civil war.
Line 1717. “Down with the tyrants, away with the fetters” - the first line of the popular
revolutionary song "Red Banner".
Lines 1884-1889. Nonsense shake-up! We need appointees... Here you go
once! Buffers are needed, sir. - This refers to the discussion about trade unions 1920-1921
Lines 2128-2129. Tverskaya, Sadovaya - streets in Moscow. Tverskaya - now
A heroic, epic and satirical depiction of our era
VALID:
1. Seven pairs of pure
Abyssinian Negus, Indian Raja, Turkish Pasha, Russian merchant, Chinese, plump Persian, fat Frenchman, Australian with his wife, priest, German officer, Italian officer, American, student.
2. Seven pairs of unclean ones
Chimney sweep, lamplighter, driver, seamstress, miner, carpenter, farmhand, servant, shoemaker, blacksmith, baker, laundress and Eskimos: fisherman and hunter.
3. The lady is hysterical.
4. Devils. Beelzebub Headquarters
and two messengers.
5. Saints. Zlatoust
Leo Tolstoy, Methuselah
Jean Jacques Rousseau and others
6. Things. Machine, bread, salt, saw, needle, hammer, book, etc.
7. The person is simple.
LOCATIONS
I. The whole universe.
II. The ark.
III. 1st scene: Hell.
2nd picture: Paradise.
3rd scene: The Promised Land.
Seven unclean couples
It was the earth that cried out for us with the voice of a cannon roar.
It was us who swollen the fields and watered them with blood.
We stand
torn from the earth's womb
caesarean section of the war.
We praise
uprisings,
riots,
revolution day -
you,
coming, brain skulls!
Our second birthday is
the world has matured.
Happens -
there will be a steamer in the distance,
will puff up
and will go along the mirror of the waters,
and for a long time you breathe smoky legends, -
This is how life has eluded us until today.
The Gospel was written to us,
Koran,
"Paradise Lost and Returned"
and further,
and further -
many many books.
Each one promises joy beyond the grave, is smart and cunning.
Here,
on earth we want
no higher to live
and not lower
all these trees, houses, roads, horses and grass.
We are tired of heavenly sweets -
let me eat some rye bread!
We're tired of paper passions -
let me live with a living wife!
There,
in theater wardrobes
the sparkles of opera etoils
Yes, the Mephistophelian cloak -
everything that is there!
The old tailor did not try for our waists.
Well,
clumsy let it be
clothes -
yes ours.
We have a place!
Today
above the dust of theaters
our motto will light up:
"All over again!"
Stop and marvel!
A curtain!
They disperse. They tear apart the curtain, painted with relics of the old theater.
Act one
At the glow of the northern lights, the globe rests with its pole on the ice of the floor. The ropes of latitudes and longitudes intersect in ladders all over the ball. Between two walruses propping up the world, an Eskimo hunter, with his finger buried in the ground, yells to another, stretched out in front of him by the fire.
Eskimo hunter
Hey!
Hey!
Loudmouth.
There is no other matter -
poke the ground with your finger.
Where is the hole?
What's flowing?
(jumping up, running up and looking under the pinching finger)
Oooh!
The work of unclean hands.
Crap!
I'll go warn the Arctic Circle.
Running. A Frenchman, wrung out his sleeves, rushes at him from behind the slope of the world. He looks for a button for a second and, not finding it, grabs the wool of his fur coat.
First appearance
Monsieur Eskimo!
Monsieur Eskimo!
It's terribly rushed!
A couple of minutes...
So here it is:
Today
at home in Paris
I'm sitting here
ev fillet,
I don’t remember if I ate something else,
and I see -
something is wrong with the big guy Eiffel.
I think - not Boches
Suddenly there's a rumble.
I run to the roof.
Winding around the house frame,
waterless surf
no fuss intermittently
ran
the neighborhoods were overwhelmed.
Paris is a troubled sea of delirium.
Invisible waves bass notes.
And for,
and above,
and under,
and before
dreadnought houses.
And before I could spread my thoughts,
whether from the Germans, or from...
I'm all
soaked to the bone.
I'm watching -
everything is dry
but it pours, and pours, and pours.
And suddenly,
the collapse of Pompeii is more pompous, the picture opens up -
with roots
Paris was torn out
and drowned in the abyss
at the world in a molten furnace.
I woke up on the ridge of flowing villages,
I collected all my yacht club experience, -
and so
in front of you,
dearest,
All,
what is left now of Europe.
B-a little.
It will calm down, of course...
about two days!
Yes, speak without these European jokes!
What do you want? There's no time for you here.
(showing horizontally)
Allow me... near your dear seals!
The fisherman annoyedly waves his hand at the fire, goes in the other direction - to warn the circle - and stumbles upon the wet Australians running out from behind the other slope.
Second phenomenon
(stepping back in surprise)
Weren’t there even more disgusting faces?!
Australian man with his wife
We are Australians.
Australian
I'm Australian.
We had everything.
Something like this:
platypus, palm tree, porcupine, cactus...
Australian
(crying, in a rush of feeling)
And everything drowned...
Everything is at the bottom...
(pointing to the reclining Frenchman)
Here, go to them!
And then they are alone.
The Eskimo, who was about to go again, stopped, listening to two voices from two sides of the globe.
It's getting stronger!
Stay north latitude!
It's raging!
Grab the southern longitude!
The third phenomenon
German and Italian officers roll down from the globe along the ropes of latitudes and longitudes and rush towards each other in a friendly manner. Both together.
Give me a shake!
Having recognized the enemies, they withdraw their outstretched hands and, snatching sabers as they go, rush.
Italian
If only I knew!
Damn Swabian
Damn Italian!
If I knew, I would!..
Italian
Eviva Italy!
Goh Fatherland!
The Frenchman throws himself between the clinging men, the Australian embraces the Italian, the Australian - the German.
Come on!
Drown!
There are no fatherlands.
(putting in sabers)
Well,
no, that's not necessary.
(shaking head)
Here's the gang!
Our merchant falls directly on the head of the Eskimo, who is about to leave again.
The fourth phenomenon
Honorables,
this mess!
Yes, I'm Asia?
“Destroy Asia” is a decree from the heavens.
But I’ve never been Asian!
(Having calmed down a little.)
At first it dripped,
then it went.
Further more,
more - higher,
poured into the streets
the roofs blew...
Quiet!
Quiet!
Do you hear?
Do you hear the stomping?
Flood! flood! flood! about the flood! flood!
Fifth appearance
Ahead is a Negus, followed by a Chinese, a Persian, a Turk, a Raja, a priest, a student, and a hysterical lady. The procession is closed by all seven pairs of unclean ones pouring in from all sides.
At least a little blacker than snow, sir,
but nonetheless
I am an Abyssinian Negus.
My regards!
I have now left my Africa.
The Nile, the river boa constrictor, wriggled in it.
How the Nile became enraged, squeezing the kingdom into a river,
and my Africa was drowned in it.
Although there is no estate,
but nonetheless…
(annoyed)
…but nonetheless
my regards.
We heard! We heard!
Please don't forget!
The Negus is speaking to you,
and the negus wants to eat.
What is this?
Must be a tasty dog?
I'll give you - doggy!
This is a walrus, not a dog.
Go sit down and don’t dirty anyone.
(Addressing the others.)
What do you want?
Nothing!
Nothing!
Drown my China.
Persia,
my Persia has gone to the bottom.
Even India
Celestial India, and that...
And only one memory remains from Turkey!
Quiet!
Quiet!
What is this noise!
Lady hysterical
(wringing hands, separates from the crowd)
Listen,
I can't!
I can’t live among animal snouts!
Let me go
to love,
to the game.
Who are these railings?
These shadows of the railings
standing on the banks of bloody rivers?
Listen,
I can't!
I’ve even forgotten how to love.
Let go!
No need!
I'm passing by!
I want children,
I want husbands
I can’t live unloved.
Listen, I can't!
(calming)
Don't rub your eyes...
don't bite your lips...
(Advancing towards the fire unclean, arrogantly.)
Which nations are you?
Unclean
To chase everything around the world
Our wandering people are used to it.
We are not nations.
Our work is our homeland.
These are the proletarians!
Proletarians...
Proletarians...
(to the Frenchman, patting him on his sizable belly)
The sound of the flood is probably in your ears?
(to him, mockingly and shrilly)
Would you lie down and sleep on the bed now?
I wish I could let you into the trenches and the mines!
Passing Miner
(smugly)
Yes -
we are nothing -
We've seen some wet ones.
The unclean pass by, separating the disgustingly huddled crowd of the clean, and sit down by the fire. A crowd of pure ones closes in a circle behind them. Pasha climbs out into the middle.
Believers!
We need to discuss what happened?
Let's delve into the essence of the phenomenon.
It's simple -
doomsday
And in my opinion - a flood.
And it’s not a flood at all,
otherwise
it was raining.
Yes,
there was no rain.
Italian
So this idea is also wild...
But anyway -
What happened, true believers?
Let's, true believers, look at the root.
The people, in my opinion, have become rebellious.
I think it's war, I.
No!
In my opinion, the reason is different.
In my opinion, metaphysical...
(dissatisfied)
War is metaphysical!
We started with Adam.
Take turns!
Take turns!
Don't create sodomy!
Shh!
Let's talk gradually.
Your word, student.
(Justifies himself in front of the crowd.)
And he even has foam on his lips.
At first
everything was simple:
day gave way to night,
but only
The dawn became too angry.
After -
laws,
concepts,
faith,
granite heaps of capitals
and the sun itself, a motionless redhead -
everything seemed to become a little fluid,
creeping a little,
a little liquefied.
Then how it will spill!
The streets are pouring
the melted house falls on the house.
The whole world,
melted in the blast furnaces of revolutions,
flows like a continuous waterfall...
Gentlemen, attention!
It's drizzling here.
Australian's wife
Nice drizzle!
I was as exhausted as pigs.
Maybe the end of the world is near
and we
We rally, yell and laugh.
Italian
(presses towards the pole)
Get here!
Closer!
It won't bury here.
(pressing the knee of the one pinching the hole with the patience of an Eskimo characteristic of this people)
Hey, you!
Off to the walruses!
The Eskimo hunter flies away, and a stream flows from the open hole into those present. The pure ones fanned out, screaming inarticulately.
E-and-and-and-and!
Ooooh!
Ah-ah-ah-ah!
A minute later everyone rushes towards the stream.
Score!
Shut up!
Clamp!
They have flown away. Only the Australian remained near the globe with his finger in the hole. In the general commotion, the priest perched himself on a couple of logs.
Brothers!
We are losing the last inch.
The last inch is filled with water.
Who is this?
Who is this wardrobe with a beard?
This is for forty nights and forty days...
Right!
The Lord advised him wisely!
There was a similar precedent in history.
Remember the famous adventure of Noevo.
(putting himself in place of the priest)
Nonsense -
and history, and precedent, and more...
Get to the point!
Let's build a smokehouse, brothers!
Australian's wife
Right! The ark!
Here's the hunt!
Let's build a steamboat!
Two ships.
Right!
I will invest all the capital!
They were saved, but we are smarter than them, in no way.
General hum
Long live,
long live technology!
Raise your hands -
who agrees.
General hum
And no hands needed.
You can see it behind your eyes.
Both the clean and the unclean raise their hands.
(who took the place of the merchant, angrily examines the blacksmith who raised his hand)
Are you going there too?
And don’t worry!
Gentlemen,
let's not take the unclean ones!
They will know how to scold us.
Do you know how to saw and plan?
(dropping)
I changed my mind.
Let's take the unclean ones.
We will only select non-drinkers and broad-shouldered ones.
(climbing into the Frenchman's place)
Shh! Gentlemen,
Maybe we won’t have to put up with the unclean yet.
Fortunately,
we don't know what's happening to a fifth of the world.
You're making noise and didn't even bother to find out
Are there any Americans among us?
(joyfully)
What a head!
Not a person, but a German chancellor
Joy cuts through the cry of the Australian woman.
An American rushes straight from the hall to those watching intently.
American
Dear sirs,
where is the ark being built here?
Here
(holds out paper)
from drowned America
for two hundred billion checks.
Silent despondency. And suddenly the cry of an Australian holding water.
Australian
Why are you staring? He'll stare!
By God, I'll take it out!
Fingers are numb...
The clean ones began to fuss. They ingratiatingly rub against the unclean.
(to the blacksmith)
Well, comrades,
let's build
A?
Kind blacksmith
What about me!
For me at least...
(Waves his hand to the unclean.)
Let's go, comrades!
Let's go, let's go!
The unclean ones rise. Saws, planes, hammers.
Act two
Ark deck. In all directions there is a panorama of lands collapsing into waves. A mast tangled with ropes of ladders rests against the low clouds. To the side is the wheelhouse and the entrance to the hold. The clean and the unclean lined up along the nearby side.
Nah!
I wouldn't want to go overboard today.
Look there:
not a wave, but a fence!
I shouldn't have confused this with you.
It's always like this
no point.
Sailors too!
Found a sea wolf.
Lamplighter
Look, I brought it up!
It hums and groans.
What a fence!
Covered with a wall.
Yes, sir.
Very stupid, sir!
I tell you with regret and pain, sir.
We would sit.
The earth is still standing.
No matter what it is, it is still a pole.
That the wolves are yours
caressing with waves.
Both Eskimos, the driver and the Australians - at once.
Look,
What is this?
What about Alaska?
Well, she darted!
Like a stone with a sling.
Whoa!
Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye!
(burst into tears, overwhelmed by memories)
My God!..
My God!..
It happened
the whole family
let's gather at the tea table -
buns,
caviar.
Baker
(measuring the tip of the nail)
Wonderful, by God!
Well, it's not a pity
not so much.
Shoemaker
I've got some vodka.
Do you have a glass?
There will be.
Guys,
let's go to the hold!
How's the walrus?
Aren't you very lean?
Nothing is fried,
nicely fried.
Clean ones. The unclean descend into the hold, singing along.
What do we have to lose? Should we be afraid of the flood?
The legs got tired - they stomped around the world.
Oh, and relaxation on ships!
Eh!
It’s not a sin to eat a walrus and drink some vodka.
Eh, no sin!
The pure ones surrounded the whimpering Frenchman.
It's a shame, really!
Stop yelling!
We'll get by somehow
let's crawl to Ararat
You'll die of hunger while the mountain is still there.
(Listens to the noise in the hold.)
Look, they're laughing!
Why don't they!
They caught fish and ate them.
Let's take a net or a spear and let's catch it too.
O-s-t-r-o-g-u?
How to handle it?
I only know how to pick at a person with a sword.
I cast my net
I thought I’d take out a fish,
tired,
and nothing -
one grass.
(confused)
How far have you grown:
first guild
And they eat algae.
Italian
(raises finger meaningfully)
Listen!
Why are we doing this then?
Why did it bother us so much?
We now have a common enemy.
(Points to the hold. He takes his arm and moves it away, speaking as he goes.)
This is what I have to do with you...
After whispering, they return.
(speaking)
Gentlemen!
We are all so pure.
Should we shed sweat at work?
Let's force the unclean ones to work for us.
I would force them!
Where should I go?
stunted!
And any of them is oblique in the shoulders.
Italian
God forbid we fight!
Don't fight
and while they're devouring the menu,
while they are sitting,
drink and shout,
let's take it and give them a pig...
Let's choose a king for them!
(surprised)
Why a king?
And then that the king will issue a manifesto -
All the food, they say, must be given to me.
The king eats
and we eat -
his loyal subjects.
(joyfully)
I told you -
Bismaroch's head!
Australians
Let's choose quickly!
But who?
Who?
Italian and French
Right!
The reins are in his hands.
What reins?
Well, what's their name...
The reins of power, or something...
Why are you quibbling?
There is only one meaning.
Climb up, sir.
(To the Frenchman, the Pasha and the student.)
You write a manifesto:
by God's grace...
and here we are,
so that they don’t have time to get out.
Pasha and others are writing a manifesto. A German and an Italian are unwinding a rope before exiting the hold. The unclean ones stagger out. When the last one crawled onto the deck, the Italian and the German changed places - and the unclean ones were entangled.
First appearance
(to the shoemaker)
Hey,
You!
Take the oath!
Shoemaker
(poor understanding of events)
Can I lie down instead?
Italian
I'll lie down for you -
You won’t get up for a hundred years!
Mister Lieutenant,
point your gun!
Yeah!
Sobered up!
It's easier this way.
Some are unclean
(sad)
Gotcha, brothers.
Like chickens with cabbage soup.
Australian
Hats off!
Who has a hat there?
Chinese and Raja
(they push the priest standing under the wheelhouse headed by the negus)
Read it,
read, they stand there not breathing for now!
(on paper)
By God's grace
We,
king of fried chickens
and the Grand Duke on the same eggs,
without ripping off seven skins from anyone, -
we tear off six, the seventh is left, -
We declare to our loyal subjects:
drag everything -
fish, bread, vegetables, pork
and what other edible things can be found.
Governing Senate
won't slow down
sort through the piles of goodness,
take it away and treat us.
An improvised senate of pasha and rajah.
We obey, Your Majesty!
(instructs) (to the Australian.)
You - to the cabins!
(To the Australian.)
You are in the storerooms!
So that the unclean does not eat anything expensive.
(To the merchant, unwinding the baker for him.)
You and him go down into the hold.
I'll go through everything with the Raja on deck.
Bring it here and come back again.
The joyful hum of the pure
Let's pile up a whole mountain of edibles!
(rubbing hands)
And then we will brotherly share the spoils
according to Christian custom.
Second phenomenon
Escorted by officers, the unclean ones dejectedly descend into the hold, followed by the clean ones, except for the Senate, who is ransacking the deck. The Australian is the first to return. There is a walrus on a huge platter. Places it in front of the negus and back into the hold.
The third phenomenon
Chinese man with Australian woman
(escorting the baker)
This one hits his forehead like a cake.
The fourth phenomenon
(with carpenter)
He has herring.
Half eaten.
Fifth appearance
(with driver)
This one is caught in possession of sausage.
Appearance Six
(with seamstress and laundress)
Sugar.
Almost took it out of their mouth.
Appearances seventh, eighth and ninth
The Frenchman returns, like everyone else. The Persian busily brings the bottle - and back. The Senate brought a bunch of bagels and ducked into the hold. For a minute there is only one Negus on stage, intently devouring what was brought. Then, tired, the clean ones climb out and, having blocked the hatch, head to the throne, showing off.
I found roast beef -
and a whole piece!
Interesting to know
what does it taste like?
Australian
The walrus got caught -
blush, juicy.
Are you hungry?
They climb up to the negus. There is an empty dish in front of the negus. In one menacing voice.
What's here?
Mamaev's army was walking?!
(in a frenzy)
Alone, after all,
one -
and to eat so much!
I would take it and smack it in the well-fed face.
Be silent!
I am God's anointed.
Anointed One!
Anointed One!
I wish I could lie down like we do...
Italian
On empty stomach.
Ugh!
This was not the day I was thinking about.
Let's lie down.
The morning is wiser than the evening.
Laying down. Night. The moon passes quickly across the sky. The moon is bowing. Dawn. In the blue morning the figure of an Italian rises, on the other side a German rises.
Italian
Are you sleeping now?
The German shakes his head negatively.
Italian
Did you wake up in this crowd?
You'll fall asleep here!
There's such a conversation in my stomach.
Well, talk, talk some more!
(interfering)
I keep dreaming about cutlets.
What else could you dream about!
Damn you! It's so shiny.
Australian
Cold.
And the night is wet.
(after a short pause)
Gentlemen,
you know what?..
I feel like I'm becoming a democrat.
Here's the news!
I have always loved people without memory.
And who suggested that His Majesty follow at his feet?
Italian
Throw your poison arrows.
Autocracy as a form of government
definitely outdated.
It becomes obsolete if not a drop of dew gets into your mouth.
Seriously! Seriously!
A revolution is brewing.
Enough strife
Let's put an end to the fighting!
Hooray!
Hurray for the Constituent Assembly!
(The hatch falls off.)
Hooray! Hooray!
(Each other.)
Play up!
Click!
The tenth phenomenon
The awakened unclean ones climb out of the hatch.
Shoemaker
What is this? Did you get too drunk?
Citizens, please come to the rally!
(To the baker.)
Citizen, are you for a republic?
Unclean
Rally? Republic? Which one?
Stop!
Now the intelligentsia will explain.
(To the student.)
Hey, you intelligentsia!
The “intelligentsia” and the Frenchman get into the wheelhouse.
I declare the meeting open.
(To the student.)
Your word.
Citizens!
This queen has an impossible mouth!
Right!
That's right, citizen speaker!
The damned one will devour everything as it is!
Right!
And no one will ever crawl to Ararat.
Right!
Right!
Enough!
Break the rusty chains!
General hum
Down with,
Down with autocracy!
Drank some blood
spoiled the people...
Alon Zanfan
With their joint efforts they rock the negus and throw him overboard. Then the clean take the hands of the unclean and disperse, singing.
Italian
(to the miner)
Comrades!
You won't even believe it.
I'm so incredibly happy:
There are no longer these age-old barriers.
(to the blacksmith)
Congratulations!
Centuries-old foundations have collapsed.
(vague)
The rest will work out
the rest is empty.
Now we are for you, you are for us.
(pleased)
So-so! Lead by the nose.
(on the wheelhouse)
Well, citizens, that's enough,
We walked to our heart's content.
Let's organize democratic government.
Citizens,
so that all this happens soon and quickly,
here we are, - God rest the soul of the Negus, - we are thirteen
we will be ministers and assistant ministers,
and you are citizens of a democratic republic, -
you will catch walruses, sew boots, bake bagels.
No objections?
Are the arguments accepted?
OK!
It would be close to the water!
Long live! Long live the democratic republic!
And now I
(unclean)
I suggest you work.
And we are for feathers.
Work,
bring it here
and we will divide it all equally, -
the last shirt will be torn in half.
Apparitions eleventh and twelfth
The clean ones set up a table, sit down with papers, and when the unclean ones bring food, they write it down in the inbox and eat it with appetite when they leave. The baker, who came for the second time, tries to look under the papers.
Why are you staring?
Get away from the paperwork!
This, brother, is not a matter of your mind.
Appearance thirteen
Blacksmith and fisherman
Let's share what we promised.
(indignantly)
Brothers!
It’s still too early for us to talk about food.
(taking them away from the table)
A shark was caught there.
Take a closer look at the shark -
does not lay eggs, is not adapted to milk.
(threatening)
It doesn’t matter whether you are Raja or Pasha,
as the Turks say:
“Hey, Pasha, don’t be naughty!”
Appearance fourteen
He leaves and a minute later returns along with other unclean people; come to the table.
Learn!
No matter how much you milk the sharks -
not be from shark milk.
Shoemaker
(to the writer)
Time to have lunch!
Finish it quickly!
Italian
Note,
how beautiful it is:
waves and seagull.
Let's talk better about cabbage soup and tea.
Get to the point!
Get to the point!
We have no time for seagulls.
They push and overturn the table. Empty plates crash onto the deck.
Seamstress and laundress
(sad)
The ministerial council lamented everything.
(jumping onto an overturned chair)
Comrades!
It's a knife in the back!
Comrades!
What is this?
Previously, they ate one mouthful, but now they devour one mouthful?
The republic turned out to be the same king, but only the hundredth.
(picking teeth)
Why are you fuming?
We promised and we divide equally:
one - a donut, the other - a donut hole.
This is a democratic republic.
Somebody needs some seeds - not everyone needs a watermelon.
Unclean
We will show you the class struggle!
Stop, citizens!
Our policy...
Unclean
Well,
Set fire at all four ends!
Let's show them what politics is like!
Hold on
smells like burning.
Let's set fire to the revolution,
what's your Bulgaria.
They arm themselves with weapons folded clean during lunch and drive the clean ones to the stern. The heels of the clean ones being thrown off flash. Only the merchant hid in a coal bin.
Madam hysterical
(all the time getting underfoot, wringing her hands)
And again and again the roof is destroyed,
and again and again confusion and noise...
Enough!
Enough!
Don't shed blood!
Listen, I can't!
Damn you!
I'm drooling!
The revolution is not a cadet for you, madam.
(Politely takes it. The lady grabs her hand.)
Look, you wicked one!
Throw her, guys, into the hatch hole!
Chimney sweep
Tama wouldn’t suffocate -
still a lady.
Why mumble?
If they return, they will crucify us on the cross.
Unclean
Right!
Right!
Either we - or them!
Comrades!
Throw away the clique with your boots.
Hey people, why aren't you rejoicing?
Rejoice!
Baker
Rejoice!
Is there a lot of bread stored?
Rejoice! When thoughts are only about bread.
Lamplighter
Rejoice! If there are only abysses everywhere.
Chimney sweep
Rejoice! When there is not a crumb left in the stern.
Several at once.
“Rejoice” you shout!
You feed us.
We're hungry.
We are tired.
You won't walk even a hundred steps.
Are you hungry? Tired?
Does steel ever get tired?
We are not steel.
So we will be steel.
Don't stop halfway.
Eaten in the drowned,
you can't take it back.
Now there is only one thing left to argue about,
so that the power does not dry up until the place of Araratov.
Let the storms hit us
let the heat fry
let hunger -
let's look into his eyes,
We'll just eat sea foam.
But we are the masters here!
Right!
Let's go toughen ourselves up!
The same night descends. The blacksmith blows up the forge. The moon is running fast.
Go now!
There was no more work to be done.
There has never been a need for more repairs.
Place your own breasts on anvils.
Hey! Who's to start?
I need new horseshoes.
Correct your hand - it's not very knotty.
I need something like this on my chest.
Lamplighter
Fake your legs, otherwise they’ll be cotton wool.
They come up one after another, the blacksmith is working. Steel and straightened ones come from the forge and are seated on the deck. Morning. Cold and hungry.
Without food is like a car without firewood.
Even I pass, I’m so healthy.
Muscle after muscle weakens from hunger.
(listening)
Listen,
What is this?
Can you hear the music?
They sit away from her and look scared. Some back into the hold. But the voice of the carpenter is no more reasonable.
The Antichrist gave us a speech
about Ararat and paradise.
(Jumps up in fear, finger overboard.)
Who's there
walks on the waves
plays his own dice?
Chimney sweep
Come on!
The sea is bare.
And who should appear?
Shoemaker
There he is!
It's coming!
This is hunger
He's coming to break his fast with us!
Well, go!
There are no people here who would fall.
Comrades, the enemy is on board!
Alive!
Everyone on deck!
Hunger
he goes to board himself.
Appearance fifteenth
They run out, staggering, armed with anything. It's dawn. Pause.
Well, go!
Nobody...
And so
Let us again look at the barren bosom of waters.
So you pray for shade in the ovens of the desert,
dying -
you see that the desert is freezing.
Mirage!
(comes into terrible excitement, adjusts his glasses, peers at the blacksmith)
There it is
in the West -
won't you notice the dots?
What to watch?
It’s like putting glasses on your tail or pounding them in a mortar.
(runs back, fumbles, climbs onto the yardarm with a pipe - and a minute later his voice bursts with joy)
Ararat! Ararat! Ararat!
From all over.
Oh, how glad I am!
Oh, how glad I am!
They snatch the driver's pipe. Huddled together.
Where is he? Where?
Yes, it seems
to the right of...
What is this?
It rose.
Straightened up.
It's coming.
That is, how is it going?
Ararat is a mountain and cannot be walked.
Rub your eyes.
Three myself.
Look!
Yes, it's coming.
Some kind of person.
Yes, man.
Old man with a staff.
Young without a staff.
Ek,
walks on water and on dry land!
Bells, ring!
Cue the ringing!
Quit your job!
Stop the factories!
It is he!
He walked, cutting through the waters of Gennesaret!
God has apples
oranges,
cherries,
springs can fall seven times a day,
and the Almighty only turned his back to us,
now he is caught in a trap by Christ.
Don't need it!
We won't let the rogue in!
Hungry mouths are not for prayers.
Don `t move!
Otherwise your hand will rise.
Hey,
who are you?
Appearance sixteen
The most ordinary person enters the frozen deck.
Who am I?
I am a lumberjack
deep forest
thoughts,
scribes entwined with vines,
human souls a skilled locksmith,
stonecutter of cobblestone hearts.
I don't drown in water
I don't burn in fire -
rebellion eternal spirit unyielding.
Into your muscles
I
dress yourself
came.
Prepare the column bodies.
Collect workbenches, machines and forges.
I will climb onto the machines and the forges.
They knock down the pile.
This rate
The world has the last one in the gambling hall.
Listen!
New Sermon on the Mount
They haven’t yet killed themselves with thunder,
the mountains of storms have not yet died down.
Oh, woe to those who clung to them - the weaklings! -
earthly arks into floating junk!
Are you waiting for Ararat?
There are no Araratov.
None.
Dreamed about it in a dream.
And if
the mountain does not come to Mohammed
then to hell with her!
I’m not yelling at you about the paradise of Christ.
where fasting people lick tea without sugar.
I'm screaming about real earthly heavens.
Judge for yourself: is Christ’s heaven,
Is it a hungry sky for the evangelists?
In my paradise the halls are full of furniture,
electrical services the peace is fashionable.
There sweet labor does not callous your hands,
work blooms like a rose in the palm of your hand.
There the sun plays such tricks,
that every step in the color world drowns.
Here the gardener's experience pores for centuries -
glass flooring, manure mound,
and I have
on dill roots
Pineapples grew six times a year b.
We'll all go!
What do we have to lose!
But will they let our sinful army in?
My paradise for everyone
except the poor in spirit,
from great fasts swollen like the moon.
It's easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle,
What does such an elephant have to do with me?
To me -
who quietly stabbed the knife
and went away from the enemy’s body singing!
Go, unforgiving!
You are the first to enter
to my kingdom of heaven.
Go, you scattered adulterer with all kinds of loves,
who has a demon running through his veins of rebellion, -
to you, tireless in your love
my kingdom is heavenly.
Go, everyone who is not a pack mule.
Anyone who is unbearable and cramped,
know:
to him -
my kingdom is heavenly.
Doesn't this one laugh at the beggars?
Where are they?
What pages are you teasing?
The road is long.
We need to get through the clouds.
We will defeat each cloud one by one!
What if hell piles up behind hell?
Let's go there too!
Let's not move backwards.
Lead us!
Where is she?
Where?
Stop staring at the prophets,
blow up everything that has been and is being revered.
And she, the promised one, will be at hand -
right here!
End.
The floor is yours. I'm not m.
Disappears. There is confusion on deck.
Shoemaker
I think he's in me.
I think he wanted me too...
Some
Who is he?
Who is this deranged spirit?
Who is he -
no name?
Who is he -
without a middle name?
Why him?
What prophecies did you cast?
There is a deadly bath all around the flood.
Let it go!
The promised one will be found!
The gaping mouth is ominous.
(Hand on the yardarm.)
There is only one road - forward through the clouds!
They rush to the mast. In chorus.
Through the sky - forward!
They climb up, and already on the yards a battle song unfolds.
We ourselves are now a thunderous sermon.
Let's try our strength in battle!
Let's go
Let's go try the last one!
Shoemaker
There, all the winners can rest after the battle.
Even if your feet are tired, let’s kick them into the sky!
Let's put it on!
Let's shoot bloody ones into the sky!
The firmament is wide open
heaven beyond the fence!
Along the sun ladders,
down the rainbow stairs!
Along the sunny gangway,
swing of rainbows!
Enough prophets!
We are all Nazarenes!
Slide onto the masts
grab the yards!
To the masts!
To the masts!
For the yards!
For the yards!
Appearance seventeenth
“For the yards!” - freezes in the clouds. When the last one disappears, a merchant climbs out of the coal box, looking around, lifts his head, shakes his head at the mast and, laughing, speaks.
You have to be an ass!
(He gestures around the ark.)
Good for four hundred thousand
minimum.
Even if it's scrapped.
But the merchant's joy is short-lived - the raised head pulled, the merchant tumbles overboard.
Act three
Scene one
Hell. Smoky yellow clouds are stretched into three tiers. On the top tier there is the inscription: “Purgatory”, on the middle one: “Hell”, on the bottom tier, two devils are sitting with their legs dangling.
Two words about food:
It’s hard for us in hell without priests,
and from Russia, as if it were a sin, they are driving people away with food.
(peering down)
What's that looming there?
Why a mast? What mast?
Some kind of steamboat.
Yes, a ship!
The cabin lights are on.
Life is inexpensive!
Look, bodies are climbing through the clouds,
They themselves climb the devil's horns.
The old man is ours
will be extremely happy.
(Snarks at the first one.)
Shut up, damn you
It’s impossible without a rumble!
Run, alert headquarters
Beelzebub.
First appearance
The first one runs. Beelzebub appears above the middle tier. Palm to forehead. Devils rise above the tier.
Beelzebub
(convinced, he yells)
Hey you,
damn!
Drag the cauldron!
Yes, more firewood -
drier,
thicker!
Hide behind the clouds, tough battalion!
So that none of those get out of the way!
The second and third appearance
The devils are hiding. From below comes: “To the masts, to the masts! For the yards, for the yards! A crowd of unclean people rushes in, and immediately the devils come out with pitchforks at the ready.
Oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh!
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
Oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh!
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
(pointing to the extreme ones, to the seamstress with a laugh)
How do you like these three?
Look, they're trying! They are digging the earth.
The hubbub began to get boring. The unclean ones tsked. Ssssss The confused devils fell silent.
Unclean
(hesitantly)
(to purgatory)
Comrades!
Do not stop!
Straight there!
Beelzebub
Yes Yes!
Damn it, go ahead!
Don't let me into purgatory!
Listen -
what kind of style is this?
Give it up!
Beelzebub
(offended)
That is, how to quit?!
Yes so.
Ashamed!
Still an old devil
at the very grey.
By God, we found something to frighten!
At the factory
iron smelting
haven't been, huh?
Beelzebub
I was not at your smelter.
That's it!
Otherwise I would fade
fur.
You live here
dandy,
so smooth and hard.
Beelzebub
Good smooth
good hard!
Enough talking! Welcome to the fires!
Baker
Sharp!
I found something to scare!
Funny, by God!
Yes we have
In St. Petersburg
you would still be paid
for such a bunt,
Cold.
And you have grace.
Complete nude
Beelzebub
Enough jokes!
Tremble for souls!
We'll suffocate you all with sulfur right now!
(angry)
They brag too!
What do you have? -
Smells slightly of sulfur.
Here they let in asphyxiating gas -
the whole steppe turns gray from the greatcoats,
the division falls to the ground at once.
Beelzebub
Be afraid, I tell you, of red-hot braziers!
You will be on pitchforks,
the hour is uneven.
(losing his temper)
Why are you boasting about some kind of pitchfork!
Your stupid hell is like honey to us.
It happened
in attack
three quarters will break out
in one breath with machine-gun fire.
The devils hung their ears.
Beelzebub
(trying to maintain discipline)
What are you worth?
They opened their mouths!
Maybe he's lying about it all!
I'm lying?!
Sit here
cave cave!
Damn it!
Listen!
I'll tell you...
...about our earthly horror.
What is your Beelzebub!
We have a spider like this
thousands of pincers
squeezed the whole earth into a bloodless bunch,
the rail was pinched by cobwebs.
Even though you don’t have righteous people or children,
the hand, I suppose, does not rise to torment, -
and we have them too!
No, devils,
you're better here.
Like some uncultured Turk,
Impale a sinner with all your might,
and we have cars,
and we have a culture...
(from a crowd of devils)
Are you eating humans?
Tasteless raw materials!
I brought you together before it was too late.
We distill it into chocolate.
(from a crowd of devils)
But?
Seriously?
And blacks were seen with tanned leather, -
for bindings so that he can go?
A nail in the ear?
Please, why?
Do you want pig hair under your nails?
If you looked at a soldier in a trench:
compare if with him -
your martyr is a snob...
Enough!
The fur stands on end!
Enough! enough!
Such a chill!
Do you think it's scary?
The fires were lit,
hung up the cans.
What the hell are you?
Yes, you are puppies!
Belts you in the factories
did you stretch your joints?
Beelzebub
(embarrassed)
Here you go!
To a foreign monastery with its own charter,
What,
Do you only gape at timid mouths?
Well, by God, are you bothering me?
Damn, like devils!
Beelzebub goes to the farmhand to hush up the conversation.
Beelzebub
I would invite you to eat bread and salt
to visit
what a treat now -
skin and bones.
Do you know what people are like now?
Once you fry it, you won’t notice it on the dish.
These bagworms are not in the robe.
You understand - there is a food crisis.
They brought in a worker the other day
from cesspools,
If you don’t believe it, there’s nothing to regale you with.
(disgustingly)
Go to hell!
(To the workers who have been waiting impatiently for a long time.)
Let's go, comrades!
The unclean ones have moved; the latter was clung to by a younger devil.
Bon Voyage!
Arrange yourself somehow in a new way,
without unnecessary holiness,
and what kind of trinity is there, for example?
And we will come to you when everything is settled.
You're sitting here
without eating
five days,
and the devils
it is known
damn appetite.
The unclean ones moved upward. Broken, clouds fall. Dark. From the darkness and debris of the empty stage, the following picture emerges, but for now the song of the unclean thunders through hell.
Break through the doors of hell with your bodies!
Purgatory to pieces!
Forward!
Don't be timid!
Purgatory to pieces!
So!
Don't be timid!
Forward!
Let's wean the body from rest!
Tiers higher!
Walk on the clouds!
Walk through the tiers!
Higher!
Over the clouds!
End of the first picture
Scene two
Paradise. Cloud on cloud. Beleso. In the very middle, decorously seated in the clouds, are the inhabitants of paradise. Methuselah speaks.
Methuselah
Holiness!
Go to the brightest power to recover,
clean up your days.
Verb Gabriel -
is coming
more than a dozen righteous people.
Holiness!
Welcome them into your midst.
Like mice, hunger plays with them,
hell shits on them,
but they wander...
(gradually)
It’s immediately obvious that they are worthy people.
Let's accept.
We will definitely accept it.
Methuselah
We need to set the table
go out together.
We need to arrange a most solemn meeting.
You are the oldest here and be the master of ceremonies.
Methuselah
Yes, I can’t...
OK OK!
Methuselah
(bows, goes to dispose of the table. Lines up the saints)
Here is Chrysostom.
Prepare a welcome toast:
- We, they say, welcome everyone, and so does Christ...
You know, the books are in your hands.
Here Tolstoy is, -
you look good, decorative,
stood and stood still.
Here - Jean Jacques.
So unfold your enfilade,
I'll go look at the table.
Are you milking the clouds, my son?
Methuselah
If you need it, it's on the table.
Slice even
one cloud,
each with a slice.
For the Holy Fathers, the main thing is not food,
and the soul-saving speeches that flow at the table.
Well,
not visible yet?
Some edge of the cloud is blowing suspiciously.
They're coming! They're coming! They're coming! They're coming!
Is it really them?
To heaven, as if the chimney sweeps were dirty.
Let's wash it.
Hmmm, it turns out that saints are different.
First appearance
It's coming from below
Yell your guns!
Fire your guns!
We are our own Christ and savior!
We ourselves are Christ!
We are the savior ourselves!
The unclean ones tumble in, breaking through the cloud of the floor.
Wow, and bearded ones!
About three hundred pieces!
Methuselah
Please, please -
quiet haven!
They let the people go crazy!
Fight, fight!
Welcome!
Methuselah
Come on, Chrysostom, start making some toast!
Unclean
What kind of toast!
We are tired,
like dogs, hungry!
Methuselah
Patience, brothers!
Now,
Now let's feed you enough.
Methuselah leads the unclean to a place where there is cloud milk and cloud bread on the cloud table.
I was being walked around.
Could I have some kind of chair?
Methuselah
No with,
not in heaven.
The miracle worker would be pitied -
over there is stooped.
Do not swear.
The main thing is reinforcement of forces.
They pounce on the ladles and edges, at first they are surprised, then, indignant, they throw away the props.
Methuselah
Taste it, taste it!
Isn’t there something more significant?
Methuselah
Should we not bathe disembodied creatures in wine?
Unclean
We are waiting for you, damned ones,
we die humbly.
If only people knew what was ahead!
At our place
such paradises
at least a dime a dozen.
Methuselah
(pointing to the saint to whom the blacksmith was shouting)
Don't yell, it's inconvenient.
Angelic rank.
It would be better to talk to the rank:
Won't your rank cook cabbage soup for us?
This is not how we imagined it.
Nora!
A real hole!
And it doesn't look like heaven.
Shoemaker
Yes, my dears,
made it to heaven!
Well, I'll tell you, the hole, I am!
So, are you sitting here like this?
One of the angels
For what?
Happens on the ground too
go to a righteous brother or sister,
and we return, pouring out our oil there.
So, feathers in the clouds and flutter?!
Weirdos!
We should get an elevator.
Second angel
And we embroider marks on the clouds, -
Christ's initials.
You could also gnaw on sunflowers.
Provincials!
If only they could visit me on earth,
I would wean lazy people away from laziness!
They sing here:
"Away with the tyrants, away with the fetters."
And they will get to you
don't look how high you are.
Just like in St. Petersburg:
the population is crowded,
the food is eaten.
Unclean
You're bored.
Oh, and boring!
Methuselah
What can you do, that’s the way our system is.
It is, of course,
Much is not landscaped, sir.
How to get out of here?
Methuselah
Ask Gabriel.
Which Gabriel?
All as one!
Methuselah
(proudly stroking his beard)
Well don't tell me
there is also a difference -
Here, for example, the length of a beard is s.
Unclean
Why talk?
Destroy!
This institution is not for us.
To the promised one!
Look beyond paradise.
Walk!
Let's build up paradise step by step.
Let's find it!
At least let's look at the whole universe!
They break paradise, soaring high.
But when they reached the top through the rubble of paradise, the seamstress interrupts the blacksmith:
Why feed the hungry dawn!
We break, we break and we break
clouds.
Isn't time running out for them?
Will it be soon, will it be soon?
Shall we wash our tired body?
Where?
Will we find ourselves in a new hell?
They fooled us!
We've been duped!
What next?
The further it goes, the creepier it gets.
(Thinking.)
Go chimney sweep! Go, spy!
From the darkness of the ruins of paradise, a new and final picture emerges.
End of the second picture
Scene three
The Promised Country. Huge gates that span the entire stage. The gates are painted in some corners, from which the streets and squares of earthly areas are faintly outlined. And above, above the fence, planted flowers sway and a rainbow shines through in seven colors. There is a spy at the gate, excitedly calling out to the climbers.
Chimney sweep
Here, comrades!
Here!
Land your troops!
First appearance
The unclean ones rise and look at the gates with terrible surprise.
Chimney sweep
Miracles!!
But this is Ivanovo-Voznesensk!
Good miracles.
How can you trust crooks, I ask you!
Yes, this is not Voznesensk,
believe honor.
This is Marcel.
Shoemaker
And in my opinion, Shuya.
Not Shuya at all.
This is Manchester.
Manchester, Shuya -
not in this case:
The main thing -
found ourselves on the ground again,
again at the same corner.
The damned earth is round,
oh, and it’s round!
Earth, but not the same!
In my opinion,
Doesn't the earth smell a little like slop?
What's that in the air -
Is some kind of sweetness brittled?
Shoemaker
Apricots!
In Shuya?
And it’s almost like it’s time for autumn.
They raise their heads. The rainbow hits your eyes.
Come on, lamplighter,
you with the ladder, -
get up and take a look.
Lamplighter
(climbs and stops, frozen. He just mumbles)
We are fools!
Well, fools!
Unclean
Yes, tell me!
Looks like the goose is catching lightning!
Tell us! Owl!
Lamplighter
I can not…
T-a-k-a-ya
k-o-s-n-o-i-z-y-ch-y...
Give me, give me a hundred miles of paganism,
so that the sun's rays are brighter and cleaner,
so as not to hang like a rag,
to be trumpeted by the lyre,
so that this tongue will be rocked by jewelers,
so that the words
nightingales carried from their mouths...
What!
And then you won’t tell a damn thing!
Burning bottles move around, gurgling...
Lamplighter
Yes, gurgling!
The tree is blooming
not a flower, but a bun.
Lamplighter
Yes, with a bun!
And the hostess is overdressed
and the owner is pug-shaped
walk around the city, damaging the sidewalks?
Lamplighter
No,
You can't see anyone from here.
I didn't notice anything of this kind.
Sugar woman...
Two more!
Yes, speak at least a little more in detail!
Lamplighter
Yes there are all kinds
dishes,
things.
Each one has a pen
each has a leg.
Factories in flags
a mile away.
Wherever the gaze of the hundred feet wanders -
in flowers
are without work
Workbench,
machine.
Unclean
(restless)
Are they worth it?
Out of employment?
And here we are skillful in verbal sports.
Maybe it will rain
will ruin the cars.
Break in!
Shout!
Hey!
Who is here?
Lamplighter
(rolling down)
Lamplighter
Things are coming!
Second phenomenon
The gates swing open and the city reveals itself. But what a city! The open colossuses of transparent factories and apartments are piled into the sky. Entwined with rainbows, there are trains, trams and cars, and in the middle is a garden of stars and moons, crowned with a shining crown of the sun. The best things come out of the windows and, led by bread and salt, go to the gate.
Along the numb rows of huddled unclean ones.
Ahhhhhhhhh!
Ha ha ha ha ha!
Revived farmhand
Who you are?
Whose are you?
What's your owner's name?
No owners!
We are no one's.
And for whom is the bread?
Salt?
Sugarloaf?
Who are you meeting?
You!
All to you!
Us?
Us?
We must be sleeping.
Dream inventions.
Once
like this
sat in the gallery.
There's a ball on stage.
Traviata
Dinner.
Came out -
and it seemed so bitter
life:
dirt,
puddles.
This won't get you anywhere now -
this is the earth.
It will fool you!
What a land this is!
The earth is dirt
earth - nights.
If you work hard on the ground, you will open your mouth,
and the fat one will come and take it away.
Calling
And you,
I suppose
will bite.
Five hundred rubles, which must be five hundred teeth
on every pood.
Same!..
Fits!..
Mouse gait.
Little has been done to us by the car!
You just have to grow teeth on the workers!
Sorry, worker!
Worker, sorry!
Ruble slaves,
slave owner's slaves
were.
Forced them to be chained!
Took care of the counters, a hundred rubles and evil,
a glow bared its teeth through the windows.
Merchants' tentacles climbed out of the shops.
The heart of the bazaars beat with anger!
Revolution,
holy washerwoman,
with soap
all the dirt on the face of the earth was washed away.
For you,
while we wandered in the heights,
washed world
blossomed and dried up!
Take yours!
Take it!
Go!
Worker, go!
Go, winner!
The leg is not a razor
maybe we won't step.
Come on, brothers,
let's try, let's go!
The unclean ones step.
(touches the ground)
Zemlitsa!
She!
Dear earthling!
I wish I could sing now!
Scream!
Pray!
Baker
(carpenter)
Sugar -
I licked it.
Baker
Sweet, just sweet.
Now there will be no sweetness with fun!
Comrades things,
you know what?
Enough of torturing fate.
Come on, we will make you,
and you feed us.
If the owner imposes himself, we won’t let him out alive!
Shall we live?
Let's live!
Let's live!
The unclean look at things greedily.
I'd take a saw. Stagnant. Young.
And I'm an igloo b.
The hand is impatient - give us the hammer!
Take it! Pigeon!
Unclean things and machines surround the sunny garden in a ring.
(offended)
Go!
Izhitsa has been slipping away quite a bit!
Stand up, little book!
The book becomes a respectfully open circle.
Why were the oxen mooing under the jugular?
We waited
were waiting
waited for years
and never noticed
Such grace is at hand.
Why do people go into museums?
Living treasure on treasure all around.
What is this - heaven or a piece of paper?
If it's our doing,
what kind of door
won't it open before us?
We are the architects of the lands,
planet decorators,
we are miracle workers.
Let's tie the rays with bunches of brooms,
so that the clouds of heaven can be swept away with electricity.
We will spill the rivers of the worlds in honey,
We will pave the earthly streets with stars.
Dig!
Dolby!
Drank!
Storm!
All cheers!
Hurray for everyone!
Sun worshipers at the world in the temple,
Let's show how we can sing.
Become choirs -
Psalms to the sun!
(solemnly)
The age-old dream is blown away -
a whole sea of mornings
Farm of peace, bloom!
You are ours!
And above us is the sun, sun and sun.
Rejoice, all who are strong,
workshop of the creators of the world, workers.
A barrel of wine is drunker
life.
Grey! Play! Burn!
The sun is our sun!
Enough!
The world has been traveled.
The chain of iron was replaced by a chain of loving hands.
Play a new game!
Circle!
Play with the sun. Roll the sun. Play in the sun!
A pause, and after it -
Let's go!
We go through towns and villages,
We'll hang our souls with flags.
Climb out of the mud
everyone to whom
Tired of the beds of overnight bunks.
Granite cities,
green villages -
our everything.
The world is a communard.
Labor of love
let's touch the ground
All,
dear to whom she is.
Grab your fill, fields!
Smoke up, factories!
Hail!
Shine on
our solar
Commune!
A HEROIC, EPIC AND SATIRIC PICTURE OF OUR ERA
Second option
“Mystery-bouffe” is the road. Road of revolution. No one can predict with accuracy what other mountains we will have to blow up as we walk this road. Today the word “Lloyd George” pierces the ear, and tomorrow the English themselves will forget his name. Today the will of millions is striving for the commune, and in fifty years, perhaps, the air dreadnoughts of the commune will rush to attack distant planets.
Therefore, leaving the road (form), I again changed parts of the landscape (content).
In the future, everyone who plays, stages, reads, prints “Mystery-Buffe”, change the content - make its content modern, today, momentary.
VALID:
1. Seven pairs of pure: 1) Abyssinian Negus, 2) Indian Raja, 3) Turkish Pasha, 4) Russian speculator, 5) Chinese, 6) Well-fed Persian, 7) Clemenceau, 8) German, 9) Pop, 10) Australian , 11) Wife of an Australian, 12) Lloyd George, 13) American and 14) Diplomat.
2. Seven pairs of unclean ones: 1) Red Army soldier, 2) Lamplighter, 3) Driver, 4) Miner, 5) Carpenter, 6) Farmhand, 7) Servant, 8) Blacksmith 9) Baker, 10) Laundress, 11) Seamstress, 12 ) Machinist, 13) Eskimo fisherman and 14) Eskimo hunter.
3. Compromiser.
4. Intelligentsia.
5. Lady with cardboard boxes.
6. Devils: 1) Beelzebub, 2) Chief Devil, 3) The messenger, 4) The 2nd messenger, 5) The guard, 6) 20 pure ones with horns and tails.
7. Saints: 1) Methuselah, 2) Jean Jacques Rousseau, 3) Leo Tolstoy, 4) Gabriel, 5) Angel, 6) 2nd angel and 7) angels.
8. Hosts.
9. Operating Promised Land: 1) Hammer, 2) Sickle, 3) Machines, 4) Trains, 5) Cars, 6) Plane, 7) Pliers, 8) Needle, 9) Saw, 10) Bread, 11) Salt, 12) Sugar, 13) Matter, 14) Boot, 15) Board with lever.
10. Man of the future.
LOCATIONS
1. The whole universe. 2. Ark. 3. Hell. 4. Paradise. 5. Land of Wrecks. 6. Promised Land.
PROLOGUE
Unclean
After a minute
we will show you...
Mystery-buff.
I must say two words:
This
the thing is new.
To jump over your head,
I need someone to help.
Before a new play
a prologue is needed.
Firstly,
Why
Is the whole theater destroyed?
Well-meaning people
This will be very infuriating.
Why do you go to performances?
In order to get pleasure -
is not it?
Is it great pleasure to watch?
if the pleasure is only on stage;
scene -
only one third.
Means,
in an interesting performance
if you build everything up,
then your pleasure will triple,
and if
the performance is uninteresting,
it's not worth watching
and one third.
For other theaters
it doesn't matter to present:
for them
scene -
keyhole.
Please sit still,
straight or oblique
and see a piece of someone else's life.
You look and see -
lounging on the sofa
Aunt Mani
yes Uncle Vanya.
And we are not interested
neither uncle nor aunt, -
You will find aunts and uncles at home.
We will also show real life,
but she
The theater has transformed it into an extraordinary spectacle.
The essence of the first action is this:
the ground is leaking.
Then - stomping.
Everyone is running from the revolutionary flood.
Seven pairs of unclean ones
and seven pure pairs,
that is
fourteen poor proletarians
and fourteen bourgeois bars,
and between them,
with a pair of tear-stained cheeks -
Menshevich.
The pole is overwhelmed.
The last refuge is collapsing.
And everyone starts building
not even an ark
and the ark.
In the second act
The public travels in the ark:
here you have autocracy
and a democratic republic,
and finally
overboard,
under the Menshevik howl,
the clean ones were thrown upside down.
The third act shows
that the workers
there is nothing to be afraid of,
even devils in the middle of hell.
In the fourth -
laugh harder! -
paradise appears.
In the fifth act there is devastation,
opening his immense mouth,
crushes and eats.
Even though we worked on a hungry belly,
but by us
Devastation was defeated.
In the sixth act -
commune, -
the whole hall,
sing at the top of your lungs!
Look with all your eyes!
All is ready?
And hell?
And heaven?
From behind the stage.
Ready!
Let's!
ACT ONE
At the glow of the northern lights, the globe rests with its pole on the ice of the floor.
The ropes of latitudes and longitudes intersect in ladders all over the ball. Between two walruses propping up the world, an Eskimo hunter, with his finger in the ground, yells to another, stretched out in front of him by the fire.
Hunter
Hey!
Hey!
Fisherman
Loudmouth.
There is no other matter -
poke the ground with your finger.
Hunter
Fisherman
Where is the hole?
Hunter
Fisherman
What's flowing?
Hunter
Fisherman (jumping up, running up and looking under the pinching finger)
Oooh!
The work of unclean hands.
Crap!
I'll go warn the polar
circle.
Running. A German, wrung out his sleeves, rushes at him from behind the slope of the world. He looks for a button for a second and, not finding it, grabs the wool of his fur coat.
German
Ger Eskimo!
Ger Eskimo!
It's terribly rushed!
A couple of minutes...
Fisherman
German
So - today I’m sitting in my restaurant
on Friedrichstrasse.
Sun through the window
it beckons.
Day,
like a bourgeois before the revolution, it’s clear.
The audience is sitting
and quietly scheidemanit.
Having eaten the soup,
I look at the bottled Eiffels.
Think:
What kind of beef should I take?
And should I start working on the beef?
I'm watching -
and lunch stuck in my throat:
something is wrong with the Alley of Victories.
Stone Hohenzollerns,
standing between the daisies,
suddenly they flew upside down.
Hum.
I run to the roof.
Fighting around the tavern frame,
waterless surf,
no fuss at all,
ran
the neighborhoods were overwhelmed.
Berlin is a troubled sea of delirium,
invisible waves bass notes.
And for,
and above,
and under,
and before -
dreadnought houses!
And before I could spread my thoughts,
Is it from Foch, or from...
Fisherman
German
I'm all
soaked to the bone.
I'm watching -
everything is dry
but it pours, and pours, and pours.
And suddenly,
the ruins of Pompeii more pompous, painting
opened up -
with roots
Berlin was torn out
and drowned in the abyss,
at the world in a molten furnace.
I woke up on the ridge of flowing villages.
I collected all my yacht club experience, -
and so
in front of you,
dearest,
All,
what is left now of Europe.
Fisherman
B-b-a little...
German
It will calm down, of course...
a day or two.
Fisherman
Yes, speak without these European jokes!
What do you want? There's no time for you here.
German (showing horizontally)
Allow me to visit your dear
seals.
The fisherman annoyedly waves his hand at the fire, goes in the other direction - to warn the circle - and stumbles upon the wet Australians running out from behind the other slope.
Fisherman (retreating in surprise)
Weren’t there even more disgusting faces?!
Australian man with his wife. (together)
We are Australians.
Australian.
I'm Australian.
We had everything.
Something like this:
platypus, palm tree, porcupine, cactus!..
Australian (crying in a rush of feeling)
And now
we're gone
everything is lost:
and cacti,
and platypuses,
and palm trees -
everything drowned...
everything is at the bottom...
Fisherman (pointing at the reclining German)
Here, go to them.
And then they are alone.
Getting ready to go again, the Eskimo stopped, listening to two voices from two sides of the globe.
Cauldron, ooh!
Second
Cylinder, ooh!
First
It's getting stronger!
Stay north latitude!
Second
It's raging!
Grab the southern longitude!
An Englishman and a Frenchman are sliding off the globe along the ropes of latitude and longitude. Everyone hoists the national flag.
Englishman
The banner has been hoisted.
I am the owner full of snow.
Frenchman
Englishman (laying out some goods)
No - mine
I'm already trading.
Frenchman (starting to get angry)
No - mine
and you look for another one.
Englishman (enraged)
Ah well!
May you die!
Frenchman (enraged)
Ah well!
I'll put a bump on your nose!
Englishman (climbs with fists on the Frenchman)
England, hip-hip!
Frenchman (climbs with fists on the Englishman)
Viv la France!
Australian (rushes to separate)
Well, people!
Not the people, but pure rabble:
there are no more empires,
no imperials
and they are still punching each other in the face.
Fisherman
Eh, you
imperialists!
German
Come on, right!
Fisherman
What a crowd!
Our merchant falls directly on the head of the Eskimo, who is about to leave again.
Merchant
Honorables,
this mess!
Yes, I'm Asia?
“Destroy Asia” is a decree from the heavens.
Yes, I’ve never been Asian!
(Having calmed down a little.)
Yesterday in Tula
I sit quietly in a chair.
How the doors will burst!
Well, I think -
from Cheka!
I have, you understand,
The cheek turned pale.
But
God is most merciful in the world:
It turns out that it’s not Cheka – the wind.
It dripped a little
then it went
further more,
more - higher,
poured into the streets
the roofs blew...
All
Quiet!
Quiet!
Frenchman
Do you hear?
Do you hear the stomping?
Many approaching voices.
Flood! flood! flood! about the flood! flood!
Englishman (horrified)
Oh my God!
Misfortune - like from a drainpipe,
and then there’s this eastern question.
Ahead is the Negus, behind him is the Chinese, Persian, Turk, Raja, priest, compromiser. The procession is closed by all seven pairs of unclean ones pouring in from all sides.
Negus
At least a little blacker than snow, sir,
but nonetheless
I am an Abyssinian Negus.
My respects.
I have now left my Africa.
The Nile, the river boa constrictor, wriggled in it.
How the Nile became enraged, squeezing the kingdom into a river,
and my Africa was drowned in it.
Although there is no name,
but nonetheless…
Fisherman (annoyingly)
…but nonetheless
my respects.
We heard, we heard!
Negus
Please don't forget -
Negus is talking to you,
and the negus wants to eat.
What is this?
Must be a tasty dog?
Fisherman
Negus mistakenly tries to sit on Lloyd George, who looks like two peas in a pod.
Fisherman
Go sit down and don’t dirty anyone.
Englishman (scared)
Fisherman (addressing others)
What do you want?
Chinese
Nothing!
Nothing!
Drown my China!
Persian
Persia,
my Persia has sunk!
Rajah
Even India
Celestial India, and that!
Pasha
And only one memory remains from Turkey!
A lady breaks through from the crowd of clean ones with an endless amount of cardboard boxes.
Lady
Be careful!
Don't tear it!
The silk is thin!
(To the fisherman.)
Man,
Help me put up the cardboards.
She's so sweet!
How spicy!..
Fisherman
Idle parasite!
Frenchman
What kind of nation will you be?
Lady
My nation is the most diverse.
At first she was Russian -
Russia has become narrow to me.
These Bolsheviks are such a horror!
I am an elegant woman
with a subtle soul -
I took it and became an Estonian.
The Bolsheviks began to press on the outskirts -
I became a citizen of Ukraine.
We took Kharkov ten times -
I settled in some republic in Odessa.
Odessa was taken, Wrangel in Crimea -
I took it and obeyed him.
They drove the whites across the sea and across the field -
I'm already Turkish
I'm walking around Constantinople.
The Bolsheviks began to come closer -
and I’m already a Parisian.
I'm walking in Paris.
I've changed forty nations, I confess, I -
Now I have the Kamchatka nation.
What a lousy summer at the poles:
You can't show a single toilet!
Fisherman (shouts at clean people)
Quiet!
Quiet!
What is this hum?
Compromiser (hysterically separates from the crowd)
Listen! -
I can't!
Listen!
What is it?
There is no dry place in the world!
Listen!
Leave me alone!
Let me go home
to the office!
Listen!
I can't!
I thought there would be a flood according to Kautsky.
And the wolves are full,
and the sheep are safe.
And now -
people kill each other.
Lovely red ones!
Dear white ones!
Listen, I can't!
Frenchman
Don't rub your eyes...
don't bite your lips...
(Those approaching the fire unclean, arrogantly.)
Which nations are you?!
Unclean (together)
To chase everything around the world
Our wandering people are used to it.
We are not nations,
our work is our homeland.
Frenchman
Blacksmith (the Frenchman, patting him on his hefty belly)
The sound of the flood is probably in your ears?
Laundress (to him, mockingly and shrilly)
Would you lie down and sleep on the bed now?
I wish I could let you into the trenches and the mines!
Red Army soldier (menacingly)
I would go into the trenches -
It's wet in the trenches.
Seeing a brewing “conflict” between the pure and the unclean, a compromiser rushes to separate them.
Compromiser
Darlings! Well, don't! Don't start swearing!
Stop looking sideways at each other.
Stretch out your hands
hug each other
Gentlemen, comrades,
I have to agree.
Frenchman (viciously)
Fisherman (viciously. Both the fisherman and the Frenchman crutch the neck of the compromiser)
Oh, you compromiser!
Oh, you compromiser!
Compromiser (running away, beaten, whining)
Here you go,
again…
I'm good to him
and he…
It's always like this:
you call me to agree,
and they will hit you on both sides.
The unclean pass by, separating the disgustingly huddled crowd of the clean, and sit down by the fire. A crowd of pure ones closes in a circle behind them.
Pasha (climbs out into the middle)
Believers!
We need to discuss what happened.
Let's delve into the essence of the phenomenon.
Merchant
It's simple -
doomsday
And in my opinion - a flood.
Frenchman
And it’s not a flood at all,
otherwise
it was raining.
Rajah
Yes,
there was no rain.
Diplomat
So this idea is also wild...
Pasha
But anyway -
What happened, true believers?
Let's, true believers, look at the root.
Merchant
The people, in my opinion, have become rebellious.
German
I think it's war, I.
Intelligentsia
No,
In my opinion, the reason is different.
In my opinion, metaphysical...
Merchant (dissatisfied)
War is metaphysical!
We started with Adam!
Take turns!
Take turns!
Don't cause sodomy.
Pasha
Let's talk gradually.
Your word, student!
(Justifies himself in front of the crowd.)
And he even has foam on his lips.
Intellectual
At first
everything was simple:
day gave way to night,
but only
The dawn has become too angry!
After -
laws,
concepts,
faith,
granite heaps of capitals
and the sun itself, a motionless redhead, -
everything seemed to become a little fluid,
creeping a little,
a little liquefied.
Then how it will spill!
The streets are pouring
the melted house falls on the house.
The whole world,
melted in the blast furnaces of revolutions,
pours like a continuous waterfall.
Chinese voice
Gentlemen! Attention!
It's drizzling here!
Australian's wife
Nice drizzle!
I was as exhausted as pigs.
Persian
Maybe the end of the world is near
and we
We rally, yell and laugh.
Diplomat (presses towards the pole)
Merchant (pressing the knee of the one squeezing the hole with the patience of an Eskimo typical of this people)
Hey, you!
Off to the walruses!
The Eskimo hunter flies away, and a stream flows from the open hole into those present. The pure ones fanned out, screaming inarticulately.
A minute later everyone rushes towards the stream.
Score!
Shut up!
Clamp!
They have flown away. Only the Australian remained near the globe with his finger in the hole. In the general commotion, the priest perched himself on a couple of logs.
Brothers!
We are losing the last inch!
The last inch is flooded with water!
Who is this?
Who is this wardrobe with a beard?
This is for forty nights and forty days!
Merchant
Right!
The Lord advised him wisely.
Intelligentsia
There was a similar precedent in history -
remember the famous adventure of Noevo.
Merchant (settling in place of the priest)
Get to the point!
Merchant
Let's build a smokehouse, brothers.
Australian's wife
Right! The ark!
Intelligentsia
Here's the hunt!
We'll build a steamboat.
Rajah
Two ships!
Merchant
Right!
I will invest all the capital!
They were saved, but we are smarter than them, in no way.
General hum
Long live,
long live technology!
Merchant
Raise your hands -
who agrees.
General hum
And no hands are needed
visible behind the eyes.
Both the clean and the unclean raise their hands.
Frenchman (taking the place of the merchant, he angrily examines the blacksmith who raised his hand)
Are you going there too?
And don’t worry!
Gentlemen,
let's not take the unclean ones!
They will know how to scold us!
Do you know how to saw and plan?
Frenchman (drooping)
I changed my mind.
Let's take the unclean ones.
Merchant
We will only select non-drinkers and broad-shouldered ones.
German (stepping into the Frenchman's place)
Shhh, gentlemen,
maybe you won't have to put up with it yet
unclean.
Fortunately,
we don't know what's happening to a fifth of the world.
You're making noise and didn't even bother to find out
Are there any Americans among us?
Merchant (joyfully)
What a head!
Not a person, but a German chancellor!
Joy cuts through the cry of the Australian woman.
What is this?
An American on a motorcycle rushes straight from the hall to those watching intently.
American
(Hands out paper.)
Here
from drowned America
for two hundred billion checks.
Silent despondency. And suddenly the cry of an Australian holding water.
Australian
Why are you staring? He'll stare!
By God, I'll take it out!
Fingers are numb.
The clean ones began to fuss, rubbing against the unclean ones.
Frenchman (blacksmith)
Well, comrades,
let's build it, huh?
Kind blacksmith
What do I need,
for me at least...
(Waves his hand to the unclean.)
Let's go, comrades!
Go, go, go.
The unclean ones rise. Saws. Planers. Hammers.
Compromiser
Hurry up, comrades,
hurry up, dears!..
Get to work!
Axes and saws in your hands!
Intellectual (moves aside)
Work -
I won’t even think about it.
I'll sit here
and I'll do some sabotage.
(Yells at workers.)
Turn around quickly!
Ruby, don't miss!
A carpenter
Why are you sitting with your hands folded?
Intellectual
I am special, I am irreplaceable...
ACT TWO
Ark deck. In all directions there is a panorama of lands collapsing into waves. A ladder-mast tangled with ropes rests against the low clouds. To the side is the wheelhouse and the entrance to the hold. The clean and the unclean lined up along the nearby side.
Mayakovsky Vladimir
Mystery Buff
Vladimir Mayakovsky
"Mystery Buff"
MYSTERY-BUFF
Heroic, epic and satirical
image of our era
SECOND V A R I A N T
"Mystery-bouffe" is the road. Road of revolution. No one can predict with accuracy what other mountains we will have to blow up as we walk this road. Today the word “Lloyd George” pierces the ear, and tomorrow the English themselves will forget his name. Today the will of millions is rushing towards the commune, and in fifty years, perhaps, the attack will be further
On which planets will the air dreadnoughts of the commune rush. Therefore, leaving the road (shape), I again changed parts of the landscape
new, today, momentary.
D E Y S T V U Y T:
1. S e m p a r ch i s t s: 1) Negus Abyssinian, 2) Raja
Indian, 3) Turkish Pasha, 4) Russian speculator, 5)
Chinese, 6) Well-fed Persian, 7) Clemenceau, 8) German, 9) Pop,
10) Australian, 11) Australian's wife, 12) Lloyd George,
13) American and 14) Diplomat. 2. Seven couples: 1) Red Army soldier, 2) Lantern
box, 3) Driver, 4) Miner, 5) Carpenter, 6) Peon, 7) Servant,
8) Blacksmith, 9) Baker, 10) Laundress, 11) Seamstress, 12) Machinist,
13) Eskimo fisherman and 14) Eskimo hunter. 3. Concordant. 4. I ntelligence. 5. L a m a s c a t o n k a m i. 6. Traits: 1) Beelzebub, 2) Chief Devil, 3) Westman, 4) 2nd
messenger, 5) guard, 6) 20 clean ones with horns and tails. 7. Saints: 1) Methuselah, 2) Jean-Jacques Rousseau, 3) Leo Tolstoy,
4) Gabriel, 5) Angel, 6) 2nd angel and 7) angels. 8. S a v a o f. 9. VALID LAND PROMISED:
1) Hammer, 2) Sickle, 3) Cars, 4) Trains, 5) Cars, 6)
Planer 7) Pliers, 8) Needle, 9) Saw, 10) Bread, 11) Salt, 12)
Sugar, 13) Matter, 14) Boot, 15) Board with lever. 10. H u m o f the future.
M E S T A D E Y S T V I Y
1. The whole universe. 2. Ark. 3. Hell. 4. Paradise. 5. Land of Wrecks.
6. Promised Land.
Wrong
In a minute we will show you... Mystery-bouffe. I must say two words: this is a new thing. To jump over your head, you need someone to help. A prologue is needed before a new play. Firstly, why was the entire theater destroyed? Well-meaning people will be very outraged by this. Why do you go to performances? In order to have fun, right? Is it a great pleasure to watch if the pleasure is only on stage? the stage is only one third. This means that in an interesting performance, if you build everything up, then your pleasure will triple, and if the performance is uninteresting, then you shouldn’t watch even one third. For other theaters, presenting is not important: for them the stage is the keyhole. Sit quietly, straight or at an angle, and watch a piece of someone else’s life. You look and see Aunt Manya and Uncle Vanya lying on the sofa. But we are not interested in either uncles or aunts; you will find aunts and uncles at home. We will also show real life, but it has been transformed into an extraordinary spectacle by the theater. The essence of the first act is this: the earth is leaking. Then - stomping. Everyone is running from the revolutionary flood. Seven pairs of unclean and seven clean pairs, that is, fourteen poor proletarians and fourteen bourgeois-bar, and between them, with a pair of tear-stained cheeks, Mensheviks. The pole is overwhelmed. The last refuge is collapsing. And everyone begins to build not even an ark, but a reliquary. In the second act, the audience travels in the ark: here you have autocracy, and a democratic republic, and finally overboard, amid the Menshevik howl, the pure ones were thrown upside down. In the third act it is shown that the workers do not need to fear anything, not even the devils in the middle of hell. In the fourth, laugh harder! paradise appears. In the fifth act, devastation, with its immense mouth open, crushes and devours. Although we worked on a hungry belly, we defeated devastation. In the sixth act, the commune, the whole hall, sing at the top of your lungs! Look with all your eyes!
All is ready? And hell? And heaven?
From behind the stage.
Ready! Let's!
ACT ONE
At the glow of the northern lights, the globe rests with its pole on the ice of the floor. The ropes of latitudes and longitudes intersect in ladders all over the ball. Between two walruses propping up the world, e s k o m o s o t n i k, with his finger buried in the ground, yells to the other
god, stretched out in front of him by the fire.
About the hunter
Loudmouth. There is no other way to poke your finger at the ground.
About the hunter
Where is the hole?
About the hunter
What's flowing?
About the hunter
Fisherman (jumping up, running up and looking under
pinching finger)
Oooh! The work of unclean hands. Crap! I'll go warn the Arctic Circle.
Running. A German, wrung out his sleeves, rushes at him from behind the slope of the world. He looks for a button for a second and, not finding it,
grabs the wool of the fur coat.
Ger Eskimo! Ger Eskimo! It's terribly rushed! A couple of minutes...
So, today I’m sitting in my restaurant on Friedrichstrasse. The sun beckons through the window. The day, like the bourgeoisie before the revolution, is clear. The audience sits and quietly chants. Having eaten the soup, I look at the bottled Eiffels. I think: what kind of beef should I take on? And should I start working on the beef? I looked and had lunch stuck in my throat: something was wrong with the Alley of Victories. The stone Hohenzollerns, standing between the daisies, suddenly flew upside down. Hum. I run to the roof. Winding around the skeleton of the tavern, the waterless surf, rushing against the bustle, overwhelmed the neighborhoods. Berlin - a restless sea of delirium, invisible waves of bass notes. And behind, and above, and under, and in front of the houses, dreadnoughts! And before I could even think about whether it was from Foch or...
I was completely sweaty. I look at everything dry, but it pours, and pours, and pours. And suddenly, the collapse of Pompeii was more pompous, the picture was torn open by the roots. Berlin was torn out and drowned in the abyss, from the world in a molten furnace. I woke up on the crest of flowing villages. I have collected all my yacht club experience, and here in front of you, my dear, is all that is now left of Europe.
B-b-a little...
It will calm down, of course... In about two days.
Yes, speak without these European jokes! What do you want? There's no time for you here.
German (showing horizontally)
Allow me to come near your dear seals.
The fisherman annoyedly waves his hand at the fire, goes in the other direction to warn the Circle - and stumbles upon those running out from behind the other
of the wet slope of Australia.
Fisherman (retreating in surprise)
Weren’t there even more disgusting faces?!
AUSTRALIAN WOMEN (together)
We are Australians.
A u s t r a l i e c
I'm Australian. We had everything. Something like: platypus, palm tree, porcupine, cactus...
A wstraliyka (crying with a surge of feeling)
And now we are gone, everything is gone: the cacti, the platypuses, the palm trees, everything has sunk... everything is at the bottom...
Rybak (pointing to the reclining German)
Here, go to them. And then they are alone.
Getting ready to go again, the Eskimo stopped, listening to
First voice
Cauldron, ooh!
Second
Cylinder, ooh!
First
It's getting stronger! Stay north latitude!
Second
It's raging! Grab the southern longitude!
Along the ropes of latitudes and longitudes, English and French people roll down from the globe. Everyone hoists the national flag.
A n g l i c h a n i n
The banner has been hoisted. I am the owner full of snow.
F r a n c u s
No, sorry! I installed it earlier. This is my colony.
A n g l i c h a n i n (laying out some goods)
No - mine, I'm already trading.
FRENCH (beginning to get angry)
No - mine, and you look for another one.
A n g l i c h a n i n
(furious)
Ah, yes! May you die!
F r a n c u s
(furious)
Ah well! I'll put a bump on your nose!
A n g l i c h a n i n (climbs his fists at the Frenchman)
England, hip-hip!
FRENCH (climbs the Englishman with his fists)
Vive la France!*
A u s t r a l i e c
(rushes to separate)
Well, people! Not the people, but a pure rabble: there are no longer empires, no imperials, and they are still beating each other in the face.
Eh, you imperialists!
Come on, right!
What a crowd!
Right on the head of the Eskimo who was about to go again
Our kupchina is overthrown.
Venerables, this is a disgrace! Yes, I'm Asia? “Destroy Asia” is a decree from the heavens. Yes, I’ve never been Asian! (Having calmed down a little.) Yesterday in Tula I was sitting calmly in a chair. How the doors will burst! Well, I think from Cheka! As you can imagine, my cheek turned pale. But God is very merciful in the world: it turns out that it is not Cheka who is the wind. It dripped a little, then it went further, more, more, higher, poured into the streets, tore off roofs...
Quiet! Quiet!
F r a n c u s
Do you hear? Do you hear the stomping?
Flood! flood! flood! about the flood! flood!
A n g l i c h a n i n
Oh my God! Misfortune is like something out of a drainpipe, and then there’s this eastern question.